As I was Passing

Cuba: The Accidental Eden

2012-01-24T23:37:00.002+08:00

Education precedes conservation. At least, this is what I believe.

I was watching a documentary entitled Cuba: The Accidental Eden. You could view it here.

The take home message was simple. Development can co-exist with conservation and in this modern era , education is imperative.

Cuba is one of the islands of the Caribbean, flanked by Mexico on its west, Bahamas on its east and Jamaica on the south. ( I bet, you never knew that, right? ;p). Neither did I. Historically it was once ruled by Spain and then America and later on Russian and Soviet Union. Till today, Cuba remains as a socialist communist country both politically and economically. It has the worlds highest doctor-to-population ratio and only recently in the year 2011, Cubans are allowed to build their own homes.

Cuba's economy evolved from farming to tourism after the U.S.A lifted its fifty year old embargo against it. With that lifting, Cuba has generated millions in revenue owing it to its Eden by accident. Cuba is relatively large for its 11 million population and much of Cuba is still unexplored and it is said that Cuba had managed to stay still in time while its wildlife thrived on fully. Coupled with this, the Cuban government has even taken a step further by introducing conservation as a constitutional policy. While the many islands in Caribbean have suffered the devastating effect of tourism which have threatened the environment and its inhabitants into extinction, Cuba's wild landscapes have remain virtually untouched.

Cuba is home to many migratory species of bird with the existence of the Zapata Swamp. A swamp which attracts more than 300 species of migratory bird annually, a phenomena that creates astounding radar images. It is also home to some birds that are only found in Cuba such as the Cuban Parrot, Tody and Trogon. The swamp is also home to Cuba's own ancient reptile, the Cuban crocodile which is said to be one of the most aggressive of its kind.

Conservation is always almost linked with passion. It is of no wonder that environmentalists and marine biologists earn very little relative to their huge contribution to the society because only their passion has kept them going. Gonzalo, Felix & Leonardo who were featured in the documentary are such people who actively participate in conserving the baby green sea turtles of the Cuban ocean on their own accord. ; what started out as " a heart's calling" evolved into a turtle hatchery. They literally dig out turtle eggs while preserving their natural temperature and humidity to allow the turtles to hatch in the same environment it was laid. Turtle eggs in Cuba are widely hunted by poachers. After 45 days, these little globe trekkers peek out to see the world and are released to the sea by tourist who pay a minimal fees to sustain the hatchery. A great example of education in eco-tourism. In Malaysia, we have similar programmes in Terengganu =) Even the coral reefs in the bed of Cuba's surrounding ocean were said to be doing much better than the rest of its counterparts in the world.

I guess in the end of the day, it is all about striking a balance between conserving what is truly original and developing what should only be essential. Cuba for now has done its part to maintain a new era of sustainability and in 2006 was the only nation in the world to meet WWF's definition of sustainable development.

I'm not too sure how well is Malaysia faring in terms of conserving herself but I do know that that my two years here in Borneo has allowed me to me watch a lot of illegal logging and massive deforestation. :( I reckon this warrants another post altogether.

I leave you all with some pictures of Cuba's amazing specimens.

Cuban Tody

Cuba's national bird, Trogon

Cuban Parrot

Cuban's painted snail. Nop, they are not painted. They exist naturally like that and are hunted to make necklace and trinkets to be sold to tourist. Please don't buy them =(

Cuban croc aka Pearly croc known to be the fastest in the world which can live up to about 75 years

Green turtles often go back to their very own birthplace to lay eggs. One such place is Cuba's quiet beaches

Cuban's E.iberia , the smallest frog in the northern hemisphere

Baccarat

2012-01-17T01:19:00.000+08:00

Friend (F): Why can't life be simple, Jivan? Why can't my mum just accept him who he is? Why does financial security has to be so important? Why does all this has to bother me? What if my mum is right? What if down the road, he'll never be able to provide for me? It's a risk that I'm taking you know? And truth is I'm not even sure if all this is not affecting me? But at the same time, there are times that I know he's really the type of person that I really want to be with. I'm stuck, Jivan. What would you do?

Me (M): I'd listen to my heart.

F: So, what if your parents disagree, you would let it go?

M: My heart would ask me to fight for it if I feel for it. The consequences would not matter. In the end, I will know that I have tried my best to defend something that I felt for.

F: So you agree, that you'll make your parents happy la?

M: If they're not gonna be happy, chances are that, I won't go ahead.

F: So you do agree with me la? That I should meet the other guy that my mum wants me to meet despite she knowing that I'm in a relationship?

M: It's not the same.

F:You know what. You don't get my point. Maybe if you're in my situation, you'll understand.

M: Yeah, maybe. I don't get yours and you don't get mine. Can we agree to disagree?

After another 90 minutes or so talking about the same thing.

M:It's very simple. At the soul level, your heart knows whats good for you but everything around you is so noisy and chaotic, you can't hear it. You just have to stop to catch a breath. That's all you need. To breathe and be silent. The answer is there and your actions then will be guided by it. Trust me. It works.

F: But you know right? People fight because of money. Marriages fail because of money. This is reality Jivan. I don't care what you think.

M:I don't deny that but I'm saying that should not be the MAIN deciding factor to pick someone. Of course, I'm not gonna marry a dude who can't even support himself but you see, financial security is subject to change. Today he can be richer than you, tommorow he can meet with an accident and be bed ridden. If today he is someone who reads the Bible with you and share your lowest point in life, even tommorow when you become the soul bread winner and come back home all beaten up with frustration while he is still bed ridden, he'll be there to read the Bible with you again. Just go back and ask yourself. If nothing else matters in this world, no money, no prestige, no education, no mum, how would you feel? If you're indifferent towards him and you still just 'want to give it a shot', then by all means, do what makes your mum happy. Go out and meet all the boys she asks you to but if your feeling tells you otherwise, then stay and fight for something you believe you feel. Again if you feel it, then chances are that you're probably right. It works this way, when you have decided on something, your next actions will strengthen your decision and it's not the other way around. Of course, this does not apply to buying apples or groceries but generally for serious matters this rule holds true.

The scenario

Person A is lower educated than you are. He's not poor poor but he doesn't earn as much as you do, probably won't for the next 2 years or so but does wonders to ease your sorrows and helps you grow spiritually. By that I mean, you know there are times when you have problems, you can just sit and talk to someone because you know they know what to say, how to say and what to do. And when that is done, you feel alright. You just feel it.

Person B is your mother or father who tells you he is not good enough for you. ( Rationally almost all of them will say this) because he is not earning more than you, does not have a house yet bla bla bla and almost logicallly they will never send their daugthers back to living in a situation less comfortable than the ones they grew up with. Fact.

This is a tricky situation alright. You're dating someone. Oh wait, not dating. In a relationship. It's a big thing for you especially when you're in that red alert age group ;p and the whole world on FB seems to be getting married and producing babies. Your clock is ticking. Peer pressure. You can't afford to make mistakes. You just want to nail it this time. But nop, your mum/aunty/father/ great uncle whoever has to do some snooping around and decides that your current bf is not good enough for you and there is so much of drama that is happening. People just can't shut up sometimes and what's worse they annoy the life out of you with their 'care and concern'.

One side of you is thinking "What if my mum is so right. I mean mothers know the best, right?" And another side of you also can't help but to wonder if "What if" the fish that is out in the sea is better than the one in your hands? Damn. There you go. Confused again.

Buddha was right. Accumulation leads to suffering. The evidence of it is scattered all around us. Money is always rearing its ugly head while love needs to be justified and explained over a 2 hour conversation. It's a mad world and everyone is forced to run the rat race. We've all become so robotic and everyone seem to go after just one thing. The bigger and supposedly better things in life. In reality, what matters is the small and the insignificant silence for it has the power to help you when you're at the crossroads. Stuck. Twisted. In doubt & denial. Anxious. Angry. Frustrated.

You see every thought that comes to your mind comes from your heart. It's simple. Let me relate to you metaphorically. You're driving to work in the morning. You see a sickly dog by the road side, you could almost see it's rib cage. A thought crossed your mind. "Ahh, that poor thing. God, please give him some food" .That was a thought. A simple prayer, you may say that came from the mind. What drove that thought? Your feeling of empathy. You felt it. It touched your heart before it went to your mind. So is the thought really from the mind or was it from your heart? The mind is heart and vice versa. No?

It's a gamble. There will always be doubt. People talking. We'll never be sure. It's like the Baccarat game of life. You'll never be certain if you're gonna win and there's really nothing you can do to change the outcome of the game. But your intuition are the cards that you're born with. It's a matter of whether you want to deal with it or not before knowing how to. If you know yourself enough, you'll deal the cards well and strike a balance, you may not win all the time but you'll also know why you lost certain rounds. Question is how well do you know yourself to know what you want? Ask yourself and it shall set you free.

Carbon Print. Your size??

2012-01-07T16:07:00.000+08:00

This article was written to be read, digested, shared, reflected and finally acted upon.

"I'm very strong but I need to speak up or else, my enemies (they have become this now) will perish too. My nature was to love them but they didn't. My body was trashed, hammered, stuffed,kicked. My eyes were poked, my limbs cut. I was ripped off my clothes and thrown hot oil. Many of my good friends perished. Lost in numbers and never came back. My enemies are growing by and large every minute and they are doing more and more things to hurt me. I'm very sad that I have to resort to this but I have no choice because my enemies are blinded by so many things and I really need to reach out to them but since I can't speak, I can only act."

In case, you don't know who she was. She is Mother Nature. She came to me in my dream. She asked me to write this post and share it with all of you.

I would not mention about the rest of the world. There are a lot of international environmental agencies, blogs and organization doing all that. I will talk about Malaysia. In Malaysia, there are two groups of people. The Conserver i.e people like me and many others I'll be talking about soon and The "Conveniencer aka Corruptor" i.e those who do not belong to the first group. Please feel free to categorize yourself.

Global warming is like love. Overrated but unappreciated.

Earth's lung disease

Mother Nature has never been more furious just like how the worlds governements and political leaders never fail to highlight environmental protection in each of the G8 meetings and every other environmental conference. See, talking and discussing about a topic is something but taking feasible actions is a whole different ball game altogether. Actions speak louder than words. No?

Truth is, the average Malaysian has no idea what G8 is but they know what G2000 is. ;p Nor does she or he knows, how much there is to be done in terms of environmental protection. In this article, I'll enlighten you on your own Carbon Print. I'm sure you've heard this term a lot.

What is it?

Everything that you buy and use, buy and don't use, eat finish, eat half and throw the rest, switch on off, the house you build, the furnitures you buy and just about everything you do that produces green house gases and cause environmental impact. In short, it's the things you do that can mutate the earth's DNA and cause significant climate change day to day little by little untill it becomes a tsunami, cyclone, heat-waves or other unknown natural disaster that is yet to happen. In Malaysia, this is seen to manifest as massive floods, rise in sea level, landslides, extreme heat in the cities and coastal erosion. In our country, resources are all too easily available so we don't treasure them. Sungguh Malaysian. Sudah terhantuk baru tengadah. But even this is an understatement because sometimes we just don't learn.

What do you really mean?

I mean that when God made the earth, He also knew that carbon dioxide can harm us, hence He gave us Amazons and many other rain forests that will be the oxygen reservoir. Now let's go back to learning some basic science. The green house gases (GHG) like carbon dioxide, methane and ozone are gases that does not allow heat to escape from the lower surface of the earth aka atmosphere because these gases are very powerful in absorbing and emiting infrared radiation. The main source of infrared light that reaches the Earth is from sunlight. Can we ask the sun to stop shining? Hmm, nop. Can we reduce the green house gases then? Yes, we can and we should. But no we don't. Through ~~greed~~ industrial revolution and human advancement activities, we have successfully released more GHG than ever before. It is said that the reported high CO2 levels now is something that was only possible 20 million years ago. A data extracted from ice cores.I mean how far back is it? Even your mind can't think right? Interestingly enough, the greatest rise in the earth's temperature evidently with all that CO2 in the air only took place in the last three decades or so. In just thirty years, we have made tsunami and killed hundreds of thousands of lives. But we don't blame ourselves. We blame Mother Nature.

Where does all these GHG comes from?

Boy, would you be surprised if I tell you? The rubbish generated by us ; takeaway lunch, plastic bags, paper cups, water consumption, travelling, fossil burning, and manufacturing. Every kilowatt (KW) of electricity we use cause the power station to generate 1kg of CO2. That happens when you open the refrigerator door, cook rice, switch the fan on, charge your phone overnight, leave the power plug in the socket but did not on it, leave the printer switch on because of the habit of turning everything on first thing in the morning in the office. I could go on and on. Also every litre of petrol or diesel you use,you release about 2.5kgs of CO2. The fastest and most efficient way for any government in the world to reduce CO2 is to have a world class public transportation system besides sending their delegates to Copenhegan or Rio de Geniro for climate change conferences. Then you ask me. Japan, Taiwan, China. They have the best public transportation in the world right? Indeed they do. But they're also negara pengeluar utama di dunia. Isn't everything made in China? Where's the Yin and Yang, baby?

What's in my rubbish?

Allow me to define the term for you. Garbage contextually means solid waste. It means stuffs that we don't want and don't care anymore because from this point onwards, we literally just don't care. Generally, our garbage contains paper, textiles, metal, plastics, garden waste and food waste. Only the last one is the smell contributor. 90% of the rest can be reduced first, reused then recycled. Besides this, every process of manufacturing and buying generates wastes that we can't see such as factory waste from manufacturing process and mining waste from extraction of raw materials.

Where does all my rubbish go?

Who cares really? All I know is that, I just dump it in my house dustbin. The maids take care of it or someone else will throw it outside the house. I mean, that's why I'm paying Alam Flora, right? See, here's where I think you really need to care. Malaysia is big. It's so big that maybe for another 20 years or so, we can keep opening up landfills to dump our rubbish. Again this is solution at the surface. Tak cukup ke? Just open a new landfill. Find some unknown island or big land. Clear the forest. You just need a piece of land right? How foolish. What we need to be educated upon is what causes the landfills to increase in number. Do you know that "Malaysians create 30,000 MTof rubbish per day!" That's 30 000 000 kg or the weight of around 1200 whales or so. So the very first step towards this never ending ever growing problem is to USE LESS or REUSE, before we even talk about recycling.

What happens to my rubbish there?

It either gets recycled, burnt, dumped at dumpsters or properly burried in landfills. In Malaysia, since awareness of recycling is still at its infancy, the latter two happens more. Dumpsters are open holes in the ground with no proper system with rats and birds swarming everywhere. Landfills means filling the land without having contact with the surrounding environment (air, rainwater,earth.) Basically, you dump but with a system. If the landfills is properly designed, our rubbish is compacted and alternated with layers of clays or plastic. Without landfills, we will be walking with our knees deep in our own trash. The purpose of landfill is to bury in such a way that it doesn't decompose much since there is not much moisture or air unlike dumpsters where trash decompose quickly and releases gases, again GHG like methane into the air. When a landfill is closed, the burried trash remains there. A misnomer to that "it goes somewhere" thought.

So how bad is this thing?

One a scale of 1 to 10, it's a 9.25 and this is no mumbo jumbo. I mean the way I see it, disastrous events has happened by and largly around us. Albeit all the hype, I still believe that the world is not going to end in this year but we're in for some massive destruction. I'm not sure how and when but it will happen. Come on, we are so near Indonesia and Thailand. Now, just how many more times will we be sheltered by that country? No, I'm not being prophetic but you see anything is possible.

How is this my problem?

Are you living on Earth or Mars?

This article is the first in the series of articles concerning the environment for the year 2012.

I Wish

2012-01-04T14:36:00.001+08:00

This isn't my original words. Something beautiful that I stumbled upon which I thought I should dedicate to anyone who can relate to it.

I Wish.

I wish I could take a look into your heart... Just to see who owns it.

I wish I'd have a chance to explore your mind.... Just to see who fills it.

I wish I could take a peek into your soul... Just to see who colours it.

I wish I could take a stroll into your dreams... Just to see who holds your hand through it.

Ayu Ikhwani

Speedo, the symbol of respect

2011-12-21T21:05:00.000+08:00

Well,I know you exist. I've seen you around though I've never really locked eyes with you. I don't know how that would make me feel. Maybe my heart will jump.

The inevitable had happened now. That moment where our eyes met. My heart dropped to the ground, splattered it's way everywhere and I was petrified. You just looked and scurried away. Speedo. You have crossed the line and I decided enough is enough. I'm very upset that you have breached the privacy that we have mutually agreed upon silently and hence I have decided to write to you.

Dear Speedo, (That's your affectionate name, just in case you're wondering)

I noticed that you and me have some things in common.

1) We're both rats technically. I mean I'm born in the year of rat and you're well, after our encounter you look more like a mouse to me. Anyway, we're same. I always thought you were the God mouse. "Moonjeli" that my mother was referring to all the time when I was growing up. See as Hindus, we were made to believe animals are God's mode of transportation though I really beg to differ on this point because logically speaking even without thinking, you a tiny little mouse would die if Ganesha, the elephant God were to sit on you; considering the term vehicle contextually. To be honest, I don't know who came up with the idea that Hindu Gods travel on peacock and mouse because really what kind of a God can't fly, right?

2) We both love cleanliness. Believe me, it takes one to recognize one. Let me apologize to you on behalf of my humankind. We have had a long misnomer about you and that is that you and your fellow other members are dirty species. I retract this statement. I believe you're one of the cleanest rat that I've been stumbled upon. Unlike some of your other friends who have chose to live elsewhere, you have decided to choose my house which is clean all the time. But then again, maybe you lived here even before I came and I intruded your privacy but still you don't pay rent. So, technically this is my house. Do you know, the humankind is one of the dirtiest of all living inhabitants in this planet Earth. Sometimes members of my kind, use public toilets in the most barbaric kind of manner. Leave alone the environment. Some from the neighbouring countries come to my country to throw rubbish as they please because they will be fined in their country. And they call you dirty. What an irony. See, I highly applaud you in your sanitation habits. You only eat in own place and poo in the same place. (Well, we humans don't do these. Just FYI) but the point to note is that you are down right civil.

3) We both tend to scare people sometimes. How do I relate to this? I realised sometimes I tend to sneak up on people rather quietly, ( I don't intend to scare them) but almost all the time, my housemates would always have that jumpy reaction when I approached them suddenly. As a rat, that's also your nature. While you think you're just doing your night rounds in the kitchen and think you're absolutely harmless, I'm holding my heart in my hand and chanting some mantras everytime I come downstairs to take water. And sometimes God might not like me disturbing him at 1am in the morning. So, I reckon should you really need your rounds desperately, I suggest you take my advice. Go outside and travel the world. Take it from me, it broadens your mind and changes your perspective of life. Also, should you be lucky in finding love (You seem like a really lonely guy) when you're out roaming the streets and decide to settle down, I strongly suggest, you move out and find elsewhere to build a family. I think by know you would have known that I don't leave any food or something that is suggestive of it in the kitchen. Should you have kids to feed, I'm afraid this won't be ideal at all.

4) We treat each other with respect. This is my most favourite of your traits. You see, you know I don't like mess. So you just quietly eat and do your mess under the stove. You take scraps from the dustbin while being very careful not to drop any along the way and quietly go back to your den. A highly commendable act for an animal whom we humans think has no brains to think. Before we go further, allow me to highlight that your current habitat is very dangerous. It can be FATAL to you. Maybe you like the stove for some reason, I don't know. Maybe you think it looks like a playground. Do you remember, that morning where I turn on the stove to heat water and you jumped. And I screamed. If I had an egg, I'd have dropped it and cursed you for three days in a row because cleaning a smashed egg is no joke. Alternatively, should your tail catch fire the time I heat the stove and should you perish in that fire, I'd have had my karma points minus out because I killed an innocent soul. Either way, you have crossed your limits the day we locked eyes. It's a win-win situation if you leave but if you insist on staying, just don't sneak up on me, we both scare the hell out of each other every time we bump into each other. This is a known and tried fact. Untill today, unlike some of your other friends outside who has given humans the Leptospirosis, not sure if you have heard that but that means like you set our "tails" on fire or something like that, you haven't done anything to me. You have not bitten anything in the house and you just happen to find your place in the world in my house without intruding my life. So the least I could do is to let you be. So long no harm is done unto others. It's alright. See, I wish more humans were like you. In many parts of the world, my kind ( I'm ashamed to admit this to you) but I guess if you meet your friends outside in a regular mamak or piss session, your friends will tell you that humans kill each other. I'm not too sure if this usually happens within your community but my species kill each other because of money, girls ( I know dumb, right?), alcohol, religion, fame, politics. Name it. Sometimes there's no reason. They just kill because in war that's what you do and making love has gone out of fashion. If only people know their boundaries, everyone would respect each other, speak kindly to others and help each other.

I don't exactly know how this letter is gonna reach you. Do you have a laptop or any of your friends own some form of communicative device? I mean you know there's WI-FI at home. ;p

Anyway, my most important point of the day is that we should never LOCK eyes again. Now I'm dead serious about this because if you're stubborn, I'll be evil. I have networks to people who own cats and I will not be reluctant to allow them to come for a visit. Now I'm sure you know who cats are. Cats are another method of setting your tail on fire purposely. So, if you just mind your own business quietly, your world as well as mine will be as peaceful as it always has been.

Yours truly,

Your homie

Of screwdrivers and binoculars

2011-12-08T16:45:00.002+08:00

I don't know if I should rejoice or I should cry. It seems like my happiness is definitely on the expense of my beloved's country's future. Sadly, my forthcoming predictions isn't shared by the leaders of my country. The many leaders of the country. They have failed, are continue failing and are slowing dragging us into the same hell hole.

The only difference is that when we actually hit hell and when all of it break lose in an ugly almost unforgiving way, we will weep and wail while the ones who actually dragged us to hell will flew off to many parts of the world undisturbed for they have creating a heaven elsewhere. This is a fact. Have you watched Inside Job yet? This is another one of it's fine example happening in yours truly.

What exactly I'm talking about here. I read in the Star newspaper today. Civil servants are to receive 13% pay hike starting next year Jan 1st under the Skim Baru Perkhidmatan Awam (SBPA). I love my job. I love being a government servant because it has allowed me to strike a balance between work and other important things in life because life is definitely not about work, work and work but I think the pay rise isn't justified especially when the election is around the corner.

I also read yesterday in an article written by a Singaporean journalist that by 2019, Malaysia would be bankrupt because we are SOOOOO much in debt to which I ask " Is this rise even unnecessary? Did we ask you? What have we achieved to earn this money really? Every year, the government expenditure has raised and will keep on raising. Our debt are growing at every minute yet this. How sound a judgement is this?

The big whales in the sea of political corruption are still very much alive, breathing and well on their way to migration and corrupt policeman still exist in many parts of Malaysia like the local newspaper man. And there are some bunch of idiots who buy marine binocolours for a price of a brand new Myvi and even worse morons who approve such requisitions. This is just another screwdriver story repeating itself and it seems like the Auditor- Generals' Report are just there to point to us that "Look massive corruption is happening here, but really it's ok, you don't have to worry because next year another hammer will cause 3000% more and we'll just report that to overide the binoculars." That's it. Year in year out you hear this kind of astonishing statistics being published in the dailies and slowly is forgotten in the course of the year and resurfaces again in another mode of thing purchased by a different department the next year. The department concerned will never admit their mistakes and the the person behind the whole scam was never identified and taken action on. How sad. Money that can be put to good use is quietly swindled away into someone or some many pockets and all we could do is just watch.

Allow me to enlighten all of you on the power of purchase.

This power is a mighty power as anyone who is designated to do the purchase has the capability to increase the country's debt by as we have seen in the binocolour case, an approximate 3000%. On the opposite end of the spectrum, anyone who wants to assume full responsibility to a purchase and turun padang to do the field work would save the government that exact 3000%.

Our governemnt has one of the best requisition system in the world. Surprised, don't be? Let me take you through it. Any requisition begins from a form, a good form. No fault in the form. You ask what you want, justify the reasons. Then the next step is to go and look for three unbiased quotations where you actually go out to look for it as this would give an idea of what is the market price. The key is to just browse around like any normal customers would do and take a note of the prices. Probably you need to make some note as to what are the prices range in those three shops. Get their name card. Go back to the office and then tell them you're from government. The key is to not let them know it earlier because almost all the businness owners have this typical notion that " Government order means can increase quotation and mark up the price". So now, you hold the cards. You tell them that you're looking for item A and saw that your shop actually offers it at price B. Here's where you need some negotiation skills. Tell them the amount you need and psycho them into believing that you're definitely gonna take the item from. Politely hung up with "Hopefully you'll be able to give a good price"

In reality, this happens

Clerk A: Hello, you kasi fax sama saya quotation scanner.Canon Ld110. Attention to Miss Tak Kisah. (Ms. Don't Care), Jabatan Kesihatan. Fax number: .5678XX45

(Calls two other company and does the same) and then proceeds to looking at Avon Magazine on her table.

Three days later, the quoatation arrives Ms.TK, looks through. Finds the cheapest among three while not being aware that the price of the item is 245% more than the market price and forwards it to her boss. Her boss En.Sign Saja (Mr.Just Sign), looks at it " Apa ini?, Oh scanner" Ok. signs it and pass it back to Ms TK. Ms TK then proceeds to Unit Perolehan (Purchasing Unit) or Aset of a particular department and hands it over to the other department. Ms TK's job is over.

In Unit Perolehan,

En. Tengok Cukup (Mr.Just See), looks at the requistion checklist and makes sure three quotation is there and the neccessary signatures are there and proceeds to issue out the LPO (Local Purchase Order). This LPO is akin to money on paper which will be handed over later to the company in charge of supplying the items for them to prepare the commercial invoice. Upon delivery of items, the invoice and other documents requested by unit perolehan will be attached by the company for the government to pay them. This is the universal system of procurement in all governement agencies.

At any one or many of the stages, thought mishaps gives birth to kan tao kakis. (KTK) aka the crocodiles. KTKs can be the clerk or the master minds, the boss who signs it themselves. If these KTKs have wider network, all three quotations are biased as they know their suppliers and all they have to do is to quote a certain amount (always way higher) then share the profit equally. You makan- I pun makan policy. Often quotations that reaches from one department to the Unit Perolehan ( a department under Ministry of Finance) rarely goes through high scrutinization as most of the UP people are clerks whose job is to look at requistions after requistions till their eye balls bleed. So if they care and they realize the item is suspiciously pricey, they would reject otherwise this would next year end up on the AG's report.

Now let me ask you. Is the system really flawed? Hell no, if you look closely, at every tier there's a filter. Someone to check if the other one has done it right. And the initial three quotations policy was to avoid any biasness and to get an even distribution of the market price. In some government agencies, quotations are to be sealed and dropped in a box which is only opened when witnessed by a committee who will then select the supplier.

How do I know all this? It's because in some departments like mine everyone is transparent and my boss is a clean slate at least that's what he has successfully portrayed. Everything is accounted for, if not "Audit Query". Anyone can ask for quotation and not just a clerk. An officer can take a walk to the local IT mall request for brochures and then proceed on to ask her staffs to call for quotation. Transparency rules.

The system never failed. The KTKs conscience failed. They're the bad apples and they exist in every government and private department tree. They're there in every branch, trunk and at the roots where it's the strongest. The only reason we harp about government all the time is because AG reports is only published on government agencies. Every private company has their own internal auditors but you don't see it leaking out in the public, do you? Maybe someone in Sime Darby bought a palm oil testing machine 101% more than the market price. Who knows? No one but it exists.

Probably all of you already knew this but what can we do about it. Here's some of my mindful suggestions. You may belong to any or more of this categories at any given time.

Purchasing clerk/ N32-36/N17 (in govs) :

Go find the quotation yourself. Believe no one above you or below you because KTK's exist everywhere. If the one above you insist on finding the quote, let them. But when the quote comes back, use your brains to think if a screwdriver really cause RM2500++. If you think it is, then God help you. If you don't believe it, BRAVO, take the next step to protect yourself, find another three quotations yourself while making sure the date and time is stamped on the quotation. Make a self declaration on the quote and sign it and get someone to witness it. Keep it away safely. Someday when MACC probe or AG reports in the year of 2019 (if we still have a governent) comes out, someone (most probably your moronic boss who signed the requisitions) will accuse you of that RM23,000 copy machine you quoted for, take out our powerful evidence and show them.

Officers ranking 41 and above/ Managers:

The same procedure as above applies to you and assuming you hold a degree to actually be in this position, I assume you're not that dumb to actually believe that a screwdriver cost RM2500. If you are the approver who signs the suspicious quotations, tell your staff politely that you're not gonna sign it unless they find a more reasonable quote and tell them if they can find it, you'll go with them to look for quotes. Sessi beramah mesra bersama pekerja. :)

The loneliest/ Greediest of the Lot/ Head of Departments (HOD) (whichever suits you):

If you're one of the heads of KTKs, you should be worried because I know what you did all year around and so many people who are reading this will be enlightened too. If you're just another humble government servant, please for YOUR sake (because at some point of time, even God can't save you), read any document before you sign.

The supplier/ The private companies/ Independant bussiness owners:

Don't quote the government people like ridiculously high price because many of them actually believe it and have no idea what in the world or thereafter that can happen to them. Most of them, have low level of awareness. Also one day, when justice prevails ( the day when AG reports comes with actions ), you'll be in hot soup, maybe you'll be dead by then but your son who took over the business from you and learn quote hike from you is gonna get a hurt real bad. While this may bring a lot of profit to you in the short tem, ultimately, you're still paying tax and the money you makan will keluar in the form of tax back to the government. You will also at the same time endlessly complain about government collecting too much of tax from you. Good on you. You brought it upon yourself.

Ms.TK, En. SS, Mr.TC, KTK's are all within us. At the brink of desperation, any mind could be and always is tempted, we could even be one of them but remember that which that doesn't belong to you, should not stay with you and that which is abundance is ought to be shared. You do your part. You do it well. You just lead by example and not by title. Those who wants to join your lead will do so, those who don't God help them.

Earth is round

2011-12-02T00:53:00.004+08:00

Today I shall share a small story.

The family humor: Whenever, we sisters feel like we have accomplished something great at home such helping our dad and mum do things after dad has nagged us ( Mum's cool, she doesn't nag), we will often brag about it to our my dad especially. Something that goes like this.

Jeeva or Me or Sathi: Pa, neenge rombe kuduthe vecherekenom. ( Pa, you're very lucky). Engele maari nalla pillainge engeyume kidaikathu ( You can't get good kids like us anywhere)

Dad: Athe nalla sollenum ( I should be saying that) .You see, it's the upbringing la. Athavethe, naa vallathe morrai seri ( Actually, it's the way I brought up you all). Kakaka. ( That's his version of laugh)

Point to note: Self praise is an inherited trait.

The story begins.

Damn it. Again I'm late as always. It's 7.36pm. My class begins at 7.30pm. It's was raining cats and dogs outside. I know I can reach in 8 minutes. And I also know my teacher doesn't begin till I'm there because he has heightened himself as a good man by setting me as a not so good example. He always says "Attending class is important. No matter how late you are. Just come. Like Jivanti. ( Looks at me and smiles, My lao shi looks a bit like Doraemon so it's hard to roll eyes or make faces at him). "I always notice you're late but that's ok, importantly you attend. We are all busy adults. Many things to do. I understand.....So hao, let's begin..."

So I arrived at 7.45pm. Saw a parking lot and I reversed park. One my right was a Pajero. Huge. Noticeable, on the left I saw a grey blue Myvi, same color as my car. Here is where I need to talk a bit about Kuching people's parking skills. It's bad. Sometimes beyond comprehensible. They're a really a bunch of good people with great manners on the road but when it comes to parking, they're selfish. It is COMMON to see one car taking one and a quarter, half or the ultimatum two parking. The size of the car doesn't matter nor does the white lines that guides you to park. Kuching people ( not all but many) has this just masuk style.

So while I was reversing, suddenly I hear a thud. Shit. I realized that I have kissed the Myvi's grey blue butt. I did look but I guess with the heavy rain, I couldn't really see plus my mind has decided on it's own that maybe the grey blue was actually my grey blue instead of the Myvi's Grey Blue. Don't know how but it happened.

So I parked and wound down my window to access the damage on the Myvi's butt. QAQ , Hmmm, new car. Some minor but noticeable scratches enough to cause "Owww" to the owner.

Dark Man: Great!!! This is exactly what you need now. Just leave. No one saw. And it's raining heavily.

White Man: Maybe you should leave a note on the windscreen. It's a new car.

Dark Man: Don't be stupid. You want to pay for it? Remember, you have commitments and a lot of lottu losseke (miscellaneous) to pay for. And besides the paper might even koyak la if you leave it in the rain. Just go, you're late for class.

White Man: Now, if this was your brand new Honda City, would you not say " Etho orre nayee, idichite pochi la, pavoom la en kadi" ( Some dog hit and ran la, Pity my new car)

I picked up the phone and rang the only person who was relevant to the current situation. My dad. He runs a "Ketuk, Spray" bussiness. So he would know how much it would cost me.

Me : Pa, bla bla bla.... So ah, how much la roughly this would cost me? If it's a new car, can get the same color paint or not? What if he insist I go to Perodua to get it painted.

Dad: No la, that paint can get anywhere la, the car not made of gold what. Kakaka. Roughly small patch means around rm120.

Me: Oh, so what you think I should do? I'm thinking of just leaving a note to the owner.

Dad: Note? No need la ma. My car also 10 guys knock before. Back, front, left, right. No one left a note. Lucky man, I'm in this business.

Me: Pa, what is this? I'm asking your opinion.

Dad: You see it's your choice la, Ma.

Me: Ok, fine. So if you were to see a note on your car like that, what would you think?

Dad: There's two possibilities la. Inthemariyum alle irukangela, noore le orethen ( People like this exist, 1 in a hundred). Secondly, Ini mesti orang kaya nie.

Me: Haha. Ok pa. I would like to be the one in a hundred orang miskin. Ok, ok bye. Late for class.

Dad: Bye Bye

I hung up, scribbled a brief story with my number on it and slipped it beneath the viper under the pouring rain. I saw this Myvi had practiced "Just Masuk Skill" as well. Had the car been in it's box, I wouldn't have brushed it. Damn.

I rushed upstairs to the classroom to be greeted by my cheerful, ever smiling Lao Shi. "Hahhh, Jivanti, there you're are. Late ah....( Gives one of his Doreamon laugh) So Hao..let's begin.
GRRR

Some 30 minutes later, I saw a sms from my dad. Typed exactly like this....

Dear Jivan I am proud of u. You r a good kakitangan kerajaan keep it up honesty best policy

To which I replied

Thanks pa. Athavethe, neenge valathe murai rombe seri ( Actually, it's the way you brought us up)

Haha.

Any given incidences in our life is like two sides of a coin. Never alike but exist in the same matter.

Good and evil lives in the same mind. It's a matter of which one you feed more. One man's misery is another man's happiness.

The owner of the car will be pissed, no doubt. But my dad was a happy man to realise that he has brought up his children well. A thought that every parent want to knows and not just see. You see what you project to the world outside, everyone can see and each parent can be proud of his or her Camry driving son or a lab coat wearing daughter. Let me ask you a question? How many of us have actually thanked our parents for guiding us to the life we have now? We say I miss you and I love you to our friends a lot. Like really A LOT. We live to hear certain words from people. We want to hear. But have you ever thought that maybe the mum and dad that sacrificed so much for us wants to hear it from us? Sometimes, the only word that we should say and must say is also the word that we never say. We are egoisitc. No la. We are shy. We are grown ups.

You may then say "Hey, I'm different ok. I post on FB shoutout. I love my dad so much. He's my hero. I let the world see how I love my parents and family.
Ok, so how many of our parents actually do HAVE FB or even know where is the power button on a laptop.

My point is: If you love and want to thank someone, tell them and not the whole world. Just say it to them because it should and must only matter to them and no one else.

Words are powerful, words are caring and words make people remember how you felt about them.

" Oh, my mum knows. Dad understands".

But you still yearn for "I miss you or I love you, You're awesome" from someone right.

Don't YOU understand?

P/s I later discovered that the car that I brushed was my Lao Shi's car. Haha. And I knew this the next time I went back for class and he said "It's ok, no need to pay me back". Just try to come early for class next time. Haha. No I was just kidding. He didn't say that.
God decided to cut me some slack and save me the expenses. Of course, I was moved by Lao Shi's kindness.

Karma can be an angel at times, not a bitch as we reckon it could be.

Hitam- Kuning

2011-11-22T22:07:00.001+08:00

Malaysia mesti kalah nye la, main macam taik"

How does taik play? One has to deeply ponder.

If such thoughts has never crossed your mind, then I say you're not a Malaysian. Thoughts like that and something along those lines never failed to visit me when I watch our national sportsmen at play. Still over the past two years, I have dilligently followed numerous international tournaments that features Malaysia in the world arena and along the way suffered let downs and dissapointment by them. Sometimes lady luck was on our side like the time when Datuk Lee beats LinDan or when our football team won the Suzuki Cup against Indonesia last year and Malaysian citizens were rewarded the next day a public holiday.

Still, history was recreated. The young tigers of Malaysia managed to defend their title for the 2011 ASEAN games and bagged Malaysia it's father of all gold medals last night. Just typing that floods me with joy. Whoever who said victory was sweet was damn well right and to a nation who trashes their football team when they suck, support EPL players all year around and hail them like God when they win, yesterday's triumph against Indonesia was the icing of the cake. Afterall, we are Malaysians and deep down, those who watched the match last night can't help but to gloat in national pride. If you do not, then I suggest you migrate elsewhere. Period.

Football is a tiring game. This is a tried fact. Earlier this year during one of our team building courses, we took to playing football at the beach. 15 minutes into the game after kicking sands and running around, after, behind and in between the legs of many people, we were panting for breath and decided to stop. Pancit.

My point is: Playing 120 minutes of football consistently with a stadium full of a 100,000 ~~crazy~~ unpredictable fans supporting your opponents is a TALL order. The pressure alone is detrimental.

I must say our young tigers fought fairly, bravely and tirelessly. I guess the only thing mattered at the mind and hearts of each of the player was to give their best and ultimately defend their title championship. It was truly heartening to watch a true one Malaysia team. No Bonai, Diego or Ferdinand. All those who were clad in those black and yellow jersey wore their Malaysian names ever so proudly. Now, that's what I call a true country. My wish is that more Dayaks, Kadazans, Ibans, Chinese, Indians, Asli and all the other races that make up Malaysia will join in the rest of our national teams to further enrich the Malaysian identity.

Albeit, the continuing price hike, political screwups and the omnipresent racial discrimination that still exist in our country, our spirit as one nation comes together when it comes to huge events like this. I've always loved that feeling. To be part of something so big yet feeling significantly small.

We should be proud of our heroes and heroines who sacrificed much of their time and strive hard to bring honour to our country.

If you think they can't hear your support screams and silent prayers from wherever you are, think again. The universe orchestrates around the same revolving energy.

I love you, young tigers!! Though I really think the black and yellow outfit resembles a bee rather than a tiger.

Malaysia, kau memang boleh. Kali ini :p

Yours truly,

The other Hitam-Kuning

P/s God, please accept my sincere apology for annoying you the entire 180 minutes of the game with the word "Please...". You know I did it for my country. Thanks a lot, though I was really hoping for a holiday. Still, you rocked!! Till the next game. XOXO.

When We Were Young

2011-11-19T23:16:00.000+08:00

Warning: This could be a potentialy long post, read if you only have TIME. (Read Facebook)

A brief visit to a stationary shop and I found myself reminiscing about my childhood days. Some things just don't change.

Like the Luna colour pencil design and the bright blue Buncho water color box. They were still like how they were 20 years ago =)

1. Arts used to be my favourite subject back in school. I remember how I evolved from the small Luna color pencil box with 12 short sticks then 12 long ones while secretly being envious of some friends who had the 24 colored box. I might even have stolen one or two from them and watch them cry. Don't judge me. You may have done it too. Maybe you stole the green tipped white eraser with that "B" alphabet. You had the entire collection all brand new. Unused. Only "B" was missing. Maybe I even stole erasers. Haha.

Probably life's most meaningful gift & priceless possesion was the 36 colored Luna box which I only got ONCE because after that younger sisters who grew up stole my color pencils, broke or destroy them to satisfy thier needs on curiousity. Karma.

My mum would tell me "Irekerethe mothe payyeh ma",aprum Jeeva periya pillai yaa noone, puthusa vangikella".

Translated simply: Used what you have first ma, After Jeeva grow up, we will buy new one.

Please note: This is the same sister who stole the color pencil from me and who happens to be 4 years younger than me.But she's so small. When will she grow up?? By then, I'd probably sulk or cry and at the same time thinking whose color pencil to steal next. (Circumstances give brith to criminals). I would later secretly hate my sister and thought my mum didn't love me anymore.

Of course I was too young to know that sharing is caring and wasting things means you're ungrateful.

2. Music became my least favourite the moment playing instruments were incorporated. Maybe because I felt like regardless of how I held the recorder and blew it, the sound that came out of it was just of single entitiy. Noise. These were on the rare days where I actually brinng the recorder to school. Most days, I

a) Forget it.

b) It went missing.

c) My grandma used it to scratch her back!! ( The invention of brown scracth stick only came in much later.)

d) I made assumptions like my sister must have taken it (Same assumption she made) because we used to share recorders among many other things.The typical middle class family.

e) My parents gave up buying 5 or more recorders in that one school year.

f) I was scared of my music teacher. I still remember his name, Cikgu Saiful.

g) Bilik guru was small and teachers have friends too. I was also scared that Cikgu Saiful would turn into Cikgu Faisal, the cikgu who threw water on students face because they forgot to do something.

End of 1994, was the first year and the only year I received SPBT (Skim Pinjaman Buku Teks) because the next year the school thought my father had a promotion and can afford to buy our own books but all I had was another sister in Standard 1 whom I must pathekeran. (Take care). She must have annoyed the life out of me. In that SPBT room that year, I experienced one of my most happiest moments, music text book for Darjah 5 was missing. Yahoo. The pegawas SPBT said we have UPSR to study for. Who cared. I don't have to hunt for recorders anymore. The world had no idea how that meant to me.

Now music is life. How ironic. It wasn't the fear of music itself. Rather the awareness that we need to know how to do something, to be guided properly so that we can enjoy it and then excell in it.

3. The person who invented the primary school's orang bukan Islam's dark blue pinafore uniform with TALI PINGGANG should be shot dead. I lived to survive 4 years of traumatic BELT hunting mission at home before the pengawas uniform saved my life during Darjah 5. Imagine the burden my small and thin shoulder had to carry. I had to look for many things besides doing homework, fighting with my other sisters and grandmother and along the way breaking sharpeners, remote controls and glass coffee table. Among the list of things to look for besides belt would be recorders, text books, color pencils, socks, shoes , then shoe lace (when Velcro shoes went out of fashion), normal name tag, Ketua Darjah name tag, badge dan lain-lain.

Here is the best part. Just when I thought, I could jump in joy because I won and my sister lost. I know. What a competion right? (Please note that me and my elder sister would be simultenously finding belt at the approximately same time, say about 10 minutes before we go to sleep) I would suddenly start crying because of one or more of the following reasons:

a) The belt that I found does not belong to me. It's my sisters. No one thought me the rule of finders keepers and losers weepers.

b) The belt's shade of blue is no longer dark. Friends will make fun. And mean pengawas will tug the belt at my waist and say "Apa ini?"

c) It's yours but the button or hook is lost which technically means I have to go and make ammends with the only grandmother that I had fought with spiritfully because only she can sew it.

d) None of the above happened or I suddenly remembered I need to bring something for arts lesson tommorow and the kedai runcit has closed.

e) I wail longer and then sleep off.

The next morning, the belt would be there because my grandma or mum would have found it and discovered many of our school treasures as well.

With time we ( the four sisters) became the Pavlov dogs, adjusted to our environment accrodingly and saved our tears for other worthy dramas. We know in the mornings, everything will be there.

This is where we learn to take people for granted when we should be learning responsibility.

4. Despite all the stealings and irresponsible conducts, I always became the Ketua Darjah or Penolong Ketua Darjah. It was very simple. I was chosen because I had nice handwriting. Apparently,good behaviour is not as popular as pretty handwriting. I think my teacher had a point because when you become the Ketua Darjah, you are bestowed upon such high powers without punishing people yet stroking your ego. YOU have just been given the permission to write on the board without solving any Maths question, fill in the blanks for tatabahasa or drawing some cleft or treble or whatever it was in music lesson. So when you have to write HIDAYAH X3 or RAZAK X 5 (that means they bising that many times, I'm not too sure how I arrived at that number or how long one bising session lasts because sometimes I remember reducing the number.) all that matters was to write it as pretty as possible because the teacher, Pn.Mogandass MUST read it. But now after learning about racism, maybe she picked me because I was also an Indian and my dad was a cop just like her husband or brother. Wait was she married then? Opps, can't remember now.

Point is, I guess she could relate to me. ;p

During Pn.Mogandass's time, there were also demotions. This is probably WEIRD to some of you but when my handwriting became worse, I became Penolong Ketua Darjah dan Zawawi ( I think his name was) among the few successful ones to take away the thone to became the next Ketua Darjah. I lost my power as the girl who always became the Ketua Darjah dan disliked Pn.Mogandass rightaway. My primary school had 6 months of morning session and 6 months of afternoon session. More WEIRD discovery, I know. Every session, Ketua Darjahs' were changed except when handwritings quality was still maintained. Can't remember how many times, I got promoted and demoted but finally it ended when I became Pengawas, during Standard 5. Haha. That time rumours were that I became one because my sister was one. I'm sure this rumor was spread by my frenemies whom I stole rubber :D and color pencils from. "Pencuri pun boleh jadi pengawas wei".

This is where I learn about being competetive, following an elder's example and practise being fake while turning a deaf ear to my environment.

5. Primary school was tough. My next fear would be the flag pole. Being a pengawas was not easy. Especially when you have to raise the "Negaraku" flag as I call it. Sometime later, I was laughed at a meeting when saying "Negaraku" flag, it was bendera MALAYSIA. Technically, Malaysia is my negara what. Damn, I wish I could tell them that then. There were many issue with the pole and the flag. You have to fold it properly. The stars and moon have to face the right direction and the pengawas pelatih ( the seniors whom we had obession over but sometimes useless ) were not always nice to show us many times. The speed to which you raise the flag. If you reach first and the music stop much later, your are SO dead. And when you successfully do it well, you have to tie it to the pole without causing it to come down at all. If some hawk eyed mean seniors saw that it went down a little while you were tying it, you WILL suffer. The fact that arts had increased my level of creativity didn't help much besides giving me an over imaginative state of mind. What if the music stop shalfway? What if the star and moon appeared right to me and wrong to them? Or the ultimate What if the pole fell on me the times we had perhimpunan in the dewan? ??? It was kind of light in weight, you know.

This is where I learned about humiliation, facing my fears , practising perfection and how important it is for us to appear perfect to the whole world. Something that we all practise untill now. Prove is written all over the perfect world of FACEBOOK. No one airs their dirty linen in public.

I guess these inexhaustive memories are worth reminiscing for it bring smiles and shed a light upon us that we have all learned to evolve into better human beings. ( I don't steal anymore ;p) Most of these life lessons held no meanings to us then. We simply acted given the way we were. Spontaneously and very childishly but indirectly it has built our character inch and by inch.

It is indeed true, looking back now I realise that the small me and the big me has many traits in common which boils down to the fact that character building isn't inherited but it was practised day in,day out through thoughts which became words which then became actions. And actions one after another made you the person you are today. This is also why you could always eat meat or kill a cockroach but when someone kicks a cat in a makan shop, you get angry at them. Because both were the choices made by you on how you feel about something and then act accordingly to your thoughts.

So if today you're someone GREAT it's because you chose to be one and because you have built your character since you were young without you having to know it. And of course it was also because you pernah kena rotan with hangers or kena belt adi (belt beating). Lastly but importasntly, you would never be where you are today if not for some great helpers in your life. Those who laughed at you, called you names like keling or babi, the mum who never bought you new color pencils and the dad who tolle urikiran you. ( A popular Indian term used when you're beaten till your skins peel and flesh bleed).

They were the fertilisers of your growth.

Please feel free to share this note, relate yourself , share your own memories or comment on any of the above mention examples. Maybe some the facts, time and names mentioned were wrong for this is as far as my memory brings me. Do not take anything personally for this is only a real life story of a frail young child who was still finding her place in this big bad cruel world. ;p

If there is any of my embarrassing moments in school you would like to share, please save me the humiliation and inbox me instead. Hehe... Kindly refer to Flagpole example for reasonings of this request. and also remember KARMA.

Yours truly,

The color pencil & rubber stealer :)

Sabah 2010- The river

2011-11-15T02:40:00.001+08:00

Day 6.

I would say, I started off this day with no idea whatsoever of the danger that awaited us. We know we were in for some rafting but I didn't really google up to see how the rafting was. So you could imagine my surprise or rather shitting bricks reaction when it all actually folded. I'll get there shortly. We boarded the bus early with Busat Travelers. Paddle or die says the signage on the bus.

Paddle or Die

I should have taken that signage more seriously. We arrived at the small town of Tenom after going through the Crockers Range. I remember learning about this range as the longest in Southeast Asia during our Form 3 geography lesson. Banjaran Crocker. We had our breakfast of perfectly made half boiled egg ( I must emphasis on this as I realized eating half boiled egg all my life has allowed me to critize on the various result I get upon placing an order for this simple dish.) This one was just perfect and Tenom coffee was out of the world. What a glorious breakfast it was. Then we took the old locomative to the starting point, Pangi. The ride on the locomative was eccentric in it's own way. There were not many seats on the deck. So you sort of stand and take in the view, it moves rather slowly but basically you get the feel of how one would travel 50 years ago in an old train. I truly enjoyed the nostalgic ride. All the way, the railway track actually runs alongside the Padas river. A very intimidating sight as I realized I'd rafting on it real soon. Upon reaching Pangi station, we were given safety briefing.

The locomotive cruising at 30km/h

We were advised on the do's and don't together with the survival techniques should the raft topple. We were told to cycle in the air with our hands crossed in front of our chest. That's call body rafting.Well, this was worst case scenario, the guide said. Liar.

Padas River runs along the interior of southwestern side of Kota Kinabalu and is only accessible by train which was used since the late 19th century. It is graded as Class III-IV river which basically means it's challenging and gets your heart pumping with all the adrenaline juices. The entire paddling on the muddy river will take about 20km which mounts to a journey of 1-2 hours. Along the way, you are expected to bump into rapids. There were 7 altogether with amusing names like Merry-Go-Round, Break Point Rapid, Scooby Doo Rapid, Cobra Rapid, Lambada Rapid and the Head-Hunter Rapid. Each of these rapid basically gives you the motion and feel suggestive to its names. We are to paddle from Pangi station through the entire distance which is through the country side of Beaufort town and finally stop there.

Group picture with another Indonesian Chinese group

Our rafting began here

Our raft

So we got onto the raft which was pushed into the river. We were told that one river guide would follow us and make pit stops at river banks with his dslr camera. We were told smile whenever we see him or just when he tells us to. He told us, we will definitely buy the pictures. He was right!!! We started off well before the starting point and was encourage to try body rafting just to get the feel. The feel of cold muddy water wasn't that inviting but we did attempt it just to get the feel.

Beginning our paddle

Shortly after we paddled. Thing is you need to sycnronize yourself in the calm water in order for the raft stay afloat in certain directions without hitting the stones and we were no paddlers but still we managed and we had a 130% faith on our river guide. He was our river God, I thought. There were times when we hit the high rapids, as high as 4-5 metres and the raft nearly felt like capsizing but didn't quite yet and every now and then the guide reassures us. Just paddle or die. Paddle. Paddle. So we chanted this like a mantra and paddled.

Then during one of those crazy rapids, what we feared most happen. Our raft capsized. It was probably our near death moment at least for a few of us. One of my friend, Magdeline later related her experience of getting caught in a whirlphool or something like that and luckily was rescued by the river God. Well, I didn't see any light during my moments ;p, but I certainly must have called all the Gods in the entire universe when I fell into the river. My brain was telling me to fight and exercise the body rafting survival technique that was thought but my heart was trembling with fear. Well,whatever body rafting didn't help certainly because no matter what you do, the water kept drowning you down and slapping you on the face and it tasted muddy. Yuck. But at that time, all I wanted was to be alive. Miraculously, I was rescued onto the raft and I spotted some of my friends through their red and blue helmet in the river while I was already on the raft. The Gods ( they were suddenly more than one of them) jumped in and dragged us one by one. Only Seng Yeong manage to swim against the current and got on to the raft by herself. For a good 15 minutes, the blood in our brains must have drain out and trippled it's circulation to the heart. We had no time to even take in the adrenaline rush because the river kept flowing and rapids kept coming. Basically, the ride was never smooth. Your raft is expected to go in all directions, in many different height when it hits the rapids and that's just the way it's going to be. So suck it and paddle.

Kinda died here :p

Hitting another rapid

Riding the tide

Somewhere along the way, we were capsized again not sure if this was by chance or by purpose. Well, the culprit was our God. We later learnt that our first downfall was intentional and the God we trusted with all our hearts and soul was the one who capsized our raft because apparently, we handled our raft too well for the first few rapids. After the second capsize, we were much more composed but the thrill was still felt. I was sitting in front and the thrill was way intense but worth the paddle.

Lunch for the survivors

After 3 hours or so of rafting, we came to our end point at Beaufort and the sun was saying its good bye. The Padas river was reflecting the last rays of sun as we sit quietly in the locomotive taking in the tranquility. I remember saying my silent thank you to all the Gods that I called earlier for that mission to save my life. ;p Padas was awesome in all aspects. I probably had never experience such an intense rush of adrenaline in such a short period of time. It was nerve wrecking but it surely was a heck of an experience. You really paddle or die. :p

At the lunch pit stop

The flinstone trolley, where the locals use to ferry humans & goods

We lived to capture this final group picture at Beaufort station with our river Gods ;) Amen

Sabah 2010 - The bay

2011-10-14T00:39:00.004+08:00

Day 5

Bamboo ferry

The next day, we had our holiday planned for Kelly Bay. This bay is situated in Kota Kinabalu itself. Probably about 40 minutes drive away. It was totally worth the money we paid. We practically had the whole island for ourselves. We arrived at the jetty to be greeted by this bamboo made ferry which was absolutely unique in its design. Apart from us, there was this another Japanese family. We were greeted warmly by the personel working there. Borneo never lacks hospitality. The rest of the day, we spent pretty much doing all the activities that was offered by the bay. We set the bait to catch crabs while we were on the bamboo ferry and then started on our first ride on the banana boat. I said first because seven another ride followed suit. We were literally throwing ourselves on the boat and off to the sea till we were sick of it. It was soooo much fun. I remember we laughed so much. Finally we decided at the eighth ride that we had enough and we went to play blow pipe and paint our own batik. We surfed a little. I mean if you could call waddling away with the board while lying down on it and took a few showing off shots. No one actually got on the surf board and surfed. :p

Blow piping

My hand painted batik ;)

Throwing ourselves sick of the banana boat :D

At the end of the day, we made our own teh tarik and since I'm quit pro at doing this at home, I excelled while the rest of my friends spilled half the tea everywhere but into the glass while 'tariking'. The roti canai combo with the hot tea tasted really good against the cold breeze. And at the end of the day, we checked our trap to see if we caught anything. Yup, we did!!! A disabled crab. It had one missing leg or hands. I don't really know. I'm pretty sure we traumatized that poor fellow with our shrieks because we were sooooo excited we caught something. Finally, when the whole caos died off, we released him back to his natural habibat. I would strongly recommend Kelly Bay for a day trip and the more people you bring, the merrier it gets.

Teh Tarik against the cold breeze

A pilot's view of the jungle

2011-09-17T00:21:00.002+08:00

So, it was just another day of my duty at the airport as a drug enforcement officer with my fellow colleague, Robin Tan (RT). We were standing as usual at the passenger's luggage area where passengers' luggage would be checked by the customs officers. We see passengers walk by, their luggage being checked. And the last lot of people are as usually the pilots and flight attendants.

The scenario

Me & RT: Talking endlessly about food, office, weather, food..... (Totally oblivious to a personnel standing nearby)

Personnel: Hi, you guys work here?

We turned around and saw a pilot who seem to emitting that "I know I'm a pilot, I look good" ~~cocky~~ aura.

Me: Hi, yes we do. We are pharmacist actually.

Pilot A: Pharmacist? What do you guys do? (In a rather shocked manner)

RT: Hi, I'm Robin. (Hands shake )

Me: We enforce actually. Jivanti. (Hands shake)

Pilot: (Hands shake). I'm...(mumbled his name.) Enforce what?

Internal monologue, IM: Duh, the law. What else do you enforce? Screws in the airport?

Me: The pharmacy law actually.

RT: We are referred by the customs if passengers bring illegal drugs and stuffs.

Pilot: How do you know?

IM: Because my mother said so.

Me: Because we're pharmacist.

IM: Clearly he wasn't listening!!

RT:Ya, we check and see.

Pilot: So you see the drugs? I see. (Nods his head). So where are you guys from?

RT: I'm from Melacca. We've been here close to 2 years.

Me: KL. (Already not interested in continuing the conversation)

Pilot: What do you guys do here? It's so boring. Pretty quiet.

Me: No, actually it's a nice place. Very chilled out. Not as chaotic as KL. You could go to town. Walk around waterfront area.

Pilot: You mean? That little Kuching town. Nothing there la.

RT: How long are you here actually?

Pilot: 24 hours. Sometimes one or 2 days.

IM: In 48 hours you can decide if a city is boring? You mean you love the traffic jam and rude drivers in KL? Oh wait, you're always 35,000 feet above the ground, you wouldn't know.

Me: If night life is what you're looking for, this is not a place to be. There's plenty of things to do. Nature related stuff. Hiking, the beach.

Pilot: Hiking? Beach? Those are for the whites la. Suntan and all. We.......(trails off)

IM: A typical city guy who's idea of fun is probably drinking to glory.

Pilot: Civilization is out of the jungle la...(Laughs)

IM: What is so funny man? So people who trek the jungles and swim the seas are uncivilized? Seriously, are you really a pilot?

Me & Robin: ~Speechless~ ( Fake smiles with the hope of ending the conversation)

Pilot: Ok, guys see you around. (Fake smile worked)

IM: I hope not.

Disclaimer: This note is not intended to defame a pilot, it's profession and the city of Kuala Lumpur. The author shall not be responsible for any personal insult taken.

Change

2011-09-12T23:41:00.001+08:00

"It's not our duty to clean them up."

It doesn't matter who said this but such a statement is powerful and very selfish.

I say it is our duty. Each and every one of us. If everyone walks away the moment realization sets in, then the cycle can never be broken.

Everyone wants change, but nobody wants to be the change. I remember reading it somewhere. I can't agree any less.

Don't be afraid to stand up for what you believe in for that which you believe makes you... YOU. And down the road, maybe 10 or 20 years or maybe even for the next generation, you may have made a change that benefits humankind. And in the end of it all, that matters.

Sabah 2010- The Mountain

2011-08-20T23:27:00.008+08:00

Warning: This could be a potentially long post.

This was suppose to be up here about approximately 15 months ago if I wasn't much of a procastinor. Clearly I excel at it but still my strong will coupled with sheer determination to write has brought me back here well after a good 11 months from my last entry. That is how long I have not been blogging.

So this much forgotten ~~awaited~~ post shall be about my trip to Sabah somewhere in May 2010 where I conquered a mountain and braved a river. The rest of it was history. :D

One of the best of trip of my life. Had I not dragged this post this long, I would have succeeded in remembering a great deal of the trip. I recollect my memories now as I rummage through my photographs. Let me just sum up the trip in days.

Day 1-2

When you hear someone says Sabah is beautiful. Belief them. I fell in love with the other half of this Borneo land the moment the airplane flew across the shimmering sea. What a beauty it was. Landing in Kota Kinabalu International Airport, we were greeted by our guide (wait, come to think of it, I can't remember if there was a guide), let's assume there is one. We headed to one of the local market (ok, I'm pretty certain there isn't a guide now) to get Kampung Adidas shoe. The weapon for our warrior climb. History has it that this RM10 rubber boots akin to football shoes are the best for the climb. The next morning, our journey begin with our guide (I'm sure this time is when he came with his minivan) picking us up by a van to the Kinabalu Park. Kinabalu Park, in the state of Sabah is a UNESCO world heritage site and is predominated by Mount Kinabalu, the highest mountain in Southeast Asia between the Himalayas and New Guinea. It's highest summit stood at 4,905m above sea level. Mount Kinabalu is known to be one of the most accessible mountains in the world. One needs no specialized mountain climbing skills to ascend it, however it isn't a piece of cake altogether. A reasonable amount of fitness is generally required and an acclimatization to the thin air at the higher altitude goes a long way here. Trust me it's a looong way to the peak. Nevertheless, this mountain that the locals believe to house their ancestors spirits can be a dangerous place as well especially during the rain or when visibility is clouded by the mist.

Although it is possible to climb to the top and back in less than 4 hours ( Yup, many crazy people do climbathon here in this mountain), most climbers take two days, with an overnight break at Laban Rata. (3,272.7m above sea level). The final attack on the peak takes place in the early hours of the second day in order to catch the sunrise at the top.

To get to the summit via Laban Rata, there are two trails which are available, the Mesilau Trail, about 5- 6km(the longer more beautiful route) or the 3km Timpohon Trail, from the Kinabalu Park headquarters itself. ( the shorter but duller route). Based on my personal experience, I would recommend the earlier for first time climbers as the altitudinal and climatic gradient from tropical forest to alpine forest provides a view to the myriad of vegetations that grew there. All hold its' own true mesmerizing beauty. We had a glimpse of the mountain in a hide and seek manner along the way in our minivan. Before reaching Mesilau Nature Resort (where we stayed before the next morning climb via the Mesilau Route), we pit stopped at Nabalu Town Shop.
This shop typically sells the local crafts and other essentials for the climb such as walking sticks, balaclava, socks, gloves and other essentials. We passed by the small town of Kundasang, which is the centre of the highland vegetable industry in Sabah. We pretended to buy fruits and vegetables from the many stalls that line the side of the road for picture sake. The Mesilau Nature Resort at 2000 m, is the pick for most climbers who ascend to the summit via the Mesilau trail. These are lodge style large log cabin houses which comes in various forms from 2-3 bedrooms to the dormitory style. We stayed in the Bishop Head 1 lodge and slept in bunk beds. It wasn't the luxurious kind of resort just a decent clean accommodation to sleep in with basic amenities.

Day 3

The next morning after a hearty breakfast, we began our walk up the Mesilau Trail as early as 7am. We were accompanied by one guide and a few porters. As our climb was during the school holidays, our porters were all school kids. We were told by our guide who is by the way a 17 year old lad that, during school holidays these boys volunteer to become porter to earn some extra cash. They exude amazing strength although all of them were barely 15 years old and while we were with our proper climbing shoes and miniature backpacks, they were just wearing flip flops and even more impressive ; with a load of at least 5kg on their back, they moved at an astounding speed, sometimes even running. The start of the trail from Mesilau Gate up to the first steep descent is an enjoyable walk in itself that only takes about one hour, one way. The trail starts from a shelter just above the reception office (where we weighed our bags to be carried and registered our names) in the tall oak-chestnut forest. As we ascend up, there were conifer trees while climbing bamboos dominate the undergrowth. After a short climb over the ridge crest, the forest suddenly becomes stunted, with rocks and boulders jumbled among tangled tree roots, covered in spongy mosses and liveworts.

The path soon rises steeply once again to an open patch, before levelling off slightly, still following the narrowing ridge crest which then gives way to the stunning view of the mountain above. We even saw the waterfalls midst the rocks of the mountain. Truly spell bounding. The ridge-top is reached just before the 1.5 km mark. Here the trail starts to descend quite steeply down the other side, through taller forest with climbing bamboos. We passed many little streams before reaching the Kipuyut bridge, a suspension bridge across the Mesilau river. Along the way there were many beautiful plants of different species. From here, the trail follows the ridge, rising steeply and continuously, up and up and up in an almost never-ending series of steps for about 2.5 km where many times I thought to myself "Why did I want to this again?? It was terminally torturous.

We reached a clearing where we rested and stapled on one of the wild berries that grew there. From here another 500 m, of trail, more or less brought us to the Summit Trail. This is actually the half way meet up point where we met the other climbers from the Timpohon trail . The whole route from Mesilau to Layang-Layang Hut is about 5.7 kilometers. From here we ascended up again to reach Laban Rata, the basecamp situated at about 3273m above sea level. Laban Rata Guesthouse is pretty fully booked all year around and even as we did our booking 6 months in advance, we couldn't secure a place. Our next alternative was Gunting Lagadan Hut which was situated higher above the Laban Rata guesthouse. So you can imagine the dread we felt when we were told that upon reaching Laban Rata, that our night stay would require us to climb further. Actually it wasn't far at all, probably about 300m away but it was steps and rocks all the way. We had our well deserved meal of the year and agreed that it was the best food in the world given the circumstances we were at. It was freezing outside and the warm soup came as blessing. After an eight hour hike, we ate like there was no tommorow. Truly glorious food.

After our lunch cum dinner meal, we rested at the Laban Rata guesthouse, this is actually the only guesthouse that serves food to all the climbers within the neighboring huts as well. Dusk came early and we were told to get adequate rest as the hike up to the summit would begin as early as 2.30am. It started raining heavily around midnight. We heard stories of fellow climbers saying that if it rains, we won't be allowed to hike up the summit as it would be too dangerous. I prayed hard probably till I fell asleep that night. We can't go back without reaching the peak. We came too far and hell I tortured myself. This better be worth it.

Day 4- Midmorning

I was awaken by the voice of other climbers in the hut. Most of whom had woken up earlier. Some were having hot drinks. We quickly freshened up. Forget about bathing. Even a simple step of brushing your teeth and washing your face would require a lot of thinking because the water was freezing cold. We had hot drinks and I couldn't resist a steaming cup of Maggi Mee against that cold weather. Laban Rata serves breakfast at 2am but to get there you need to go down to eat and come back up again to the Summit Trail. A totally unnecessary feat I suggest only if you enjoy wasting time at 2.30am in the morning or if you regard yourself as the Hulk of Mountain Climbing. We packed our stuffs and left the hut with the other climbers. Any latter than 3am, you're risking of missing the first glimpse of sun at the mountain's peak. It was probably 3 degrees in the air outside because the rain had just stopped. I must say I underestimated the bone seeping chillness. The cold air that slaps you in the face really stings at times and in less than 1o minutes, my hands and feet were already numb.
Probably just about 15minutes of the Summit Trail, I was already weak and was on the verge of giving up. But perseverance was prudent. It was pitch dark apart from the light from my head torchlight (A climbing essential). And soon enough I was separated from my other 5 friends who started the climb with me as we all had different paces and the hike was getting more difficult with the oxygen thinning. Our next stop was the Sayat-Sayat Hut, the only hut where we must stop for registration and refil our water bottles. As the Summit Trail is predominantly rocks with minimal vegetation, many times we had to held on to the ropes that were placed on the rocks for stability. Some trails were as steep as 70-80degrees. Tough grasses and other plants cling to rock cervices, flowering and fruiting only a few centimeters tall. As we pass the 8km mark, we could see the South Peak and St. John's Peak on our left.
From here the bare granite slabs stretch endlessly ahead to the pile of jumbled rocks that is Low's Peak (the peak at the back of our one ringgit note, bet you didn't that ;) which I think is rather ironic of a name for the highest point of the summit, the 4095m mark. The bare granite slabs stretched ahead me were the longest 400 m or so of my life, at least that's how I felt while I was there. I was the second to reach among my team members just in time to catch the rising sun at around 5.30am. What a stunning view it was. By 6.00am, it was bright enough to see all the surrounding peaks and as the rock summit is a rather small place, it gets crowded with climbers rather easily. After a short stop at the summit to get the neccesarry but the most meaningful picture of the trip, we descended down. Further down on the right, we could see the South Peak. Along the summit plateau, as we walk down we saw the Ugly Sister's Peak and Donkeys Ears Peak on our left.
It's only as we descended down, we could see the whole horizon below us as it was dark when we hike up. It was a terrific view. The Kundasang and Ranau town was clearly visible because the sun was already up. On our way down, we spotted the Rabbit rock. The granite slabs of the mountain rocks actually created a rabbit image. Look closely and you'll spot it. It was actually, on my way down that I realized how dangerous some of the steep slope can be and with no helmet or climbing harness, it could be fatal with a mere miss of one's step . Descending down, we still had to use the ropes but with our body facing the mountain. Kinda like a back fall only hoping no one would fall. I had a little slip in one of the slope and hit my head but managed somehow to cling to someone. Scary. Thinking about it now, I could have slipped and injured myself.

We didn't make at a pit stop at Laban Rata anymore and headed straight down. Another more challenging ordeal is the climb down. As we were exhausted coupled with all the weights on our thighs, knees and ball of foot, we had to walk carefully. We went down the Timpohon trail which was downhill about 90% of the time. Although it was down slope all the way, the gravity pull was tough on our thighs and toes. I advise future climbers to wear an open toe sandals with socks or alternatively you could cut out the front part of the Kampung Adidas shoes to prevent your toes from hitting the insides of the shoe. We reached the Timpohon gate shortly before lunch with swollen feet and a great sigh of relief. And I decided this was probably my once and only hike up this mountain. No more self torture trip. We collected our colourful certificate ( The one who doesn't make it to the summit gets a black and white mediocre :p cert). Our trip ended with a buffet lunch, one that we again greatly welcome. By this time, all we wanted to do was to go back and rest for we have another 2 days of activities to continue with.

Though it was momentarily tiring and seemingly impossible sometimes, I must say it was a great achievement for us as we were never the sort who exercise let alone climb. The beauty of the mountain and its surroundings was worth every little ~~torturous~~ step.

Servicing the Kg.Sepit villagers

2010-10-21T23:00:00.001+08:00

Thoughts become actions. Well, I suppose that is how this event unfolded because a few months ago I fumbled upon a blog about doctors going to the rural areas in Sarawak to do community service and I thought to myself. Maybe I should see if I could get into this program or something. Just maybe.

Here I am now, dead tired but still having the passion to write after 9 hours of completing my first ever rural community service.

It was a rewarding feat. I admit it's not for the faint hearted. You see when you want something, the universe conspires together with you to bring you to it. I had the opportunity to do this service because a colleague of mine, the great Robin Tan (RT) had his visits to a few of the villages in Kuching and having to see his pictures, I was totally excited and was really looking forward for such an opportunity which came on the 16th of October 2010.

I was told by a fellow partner that we would be going to Kg.Sepit, in Borneo Highlands of Sarawak. "You could google it up" he said. I forgo it thinking I'd rather be surprised by it and boy I was. Our journey began by me parking my car at the leader's house, Charlie Chan. Charlie through the Sai Baba Association of Kuching, a NGO body has been doing this service for over 15 years. Gathering doctors, dentists, and gladly now pharmacist taking over the job to dispense drugs which was done by doctors then, barbers and cook ,taking them to the many of the rural villages that is scattered all over Sarawak and providing the locals assisted medical services at no charge.

Our destination was Kg.Sepit, nested deep in the mountains of Borneo Highlands. We hopped on into Charlie's Land Cruiser and travelled the occasional bumpy road for an hour before we stopped and transferred all the belongings needed such as XXL sized cooking utensils,the portable pharmacy, supplies of dry cooking ingredients, bandages and vegetables as we will be cooking for the villagers there. These items were all carried by the local's who own motorcycles. Our adventure was just about to begin.


The necessary supplies to be carried to the village.

Well, the only access to this village is by foot. Which means we had to trek up the steep, uneven mountain road before reaching the village and the sun was at its' glorious, showing us no sign of sympathy. I love the outdoors but thirty five degrees in the air was a tough ordeal. Our team comprised of the dual Charlies, Charlie Lau & Charlie Chan, the social service veterans, two house officers from the Sarawak General Hospital, the handsome Dr.Khai and the spontaneous Dr.Wong, the dispensing pharmacist that would be me and another friend Chun Wei and three other foreign students, Sophie & Lee Fay from London and Jared from Australia.

We began our journey up to the mountains at 10.30am and reached shortly before 1pm. I guess my regular swim workout has done nothing for my stamina as I was at the terminal end of the line and Charlie Lau at his 50's passing remarks like "Let us know , if you need to rest" -_-
I remember praying at each steep slope. "God, let this be the last one. But nop they just keep coming. It was a freaking winding mountain.What was I expecting??"

Beginning our journey. On the right.The only boarding school where kids from 7 villages go to

One of the many suspension bridge that we crossed headed by Charlie Lau

Intermittently there would be bamboo suspension bridges, tied together with wild boar hair which we had to pass. These are granted passage over streams which I had the longing desire to jump into given the hot weather. Occasionally we would pass other locals, most carrying giant baskets on their head. The baskets were made of bamboo and rattan and had a long woven strap attached to it. The strap was placed over the bearers forehead as a means of supporting the weight on their back. The villagers would carry food supplies back to their village. This reminded me a lot of my Mount Kinabalu hike which warrants for another post. A long due post. Sigh. I will have to get to that someday.

The view of Kg.Sepit from the land below

On our way we passed by two other villages which were Kg.Assum & Kg. Parang. Both these villages have been visited by the The Sai Group before. All torturous journey comes to an end. Thank heavens. =)

We arrived at Kg.Sepit, which is tucked between two high ridges, lending credit to the kampung’s name, which literally means “ that which is trapped " Sepit is comprised of perhaps 30 homes. Each home is built of bare hardwood and elevated several feet off the ground by stilts. Most homes have large, bamboo decks and tin roofs. Sepit families are largely the Bidayuh clan. Most of them Christians. Breathtaking beauty on its own. The village is situated right smack in the middle of the highlands. The left, right and the view in front of me was the unviolated scenic mountains and up above the unmolested vision of the bright blue sky with its fluffy white clouds. Some things just don't change. Like how mother nature at its purest becomes a silent peaceful companion.

Real people live here. Like you and I. No tree house. No guys wear loin cloth nor the women walk topless. We felt welcomed and instantly popular. Curious onlookers were aplenty. You could hear gigles and laughter. The kids would look at us from afar and when we look back, they shy away, hiding behind their elders or a tree. Sometimes they are about a few metres away and when you tried approaching them or try to snap a picture or two, they scatter away. Then they would peek again, hoping you would snap their pictures. Eventually, every little kid wanted to be photographed and with time they warmed up.

After a short nap on the cool wooden floor, we took our exploration another step further- trekking deeper into the jungle towards a waterfall. The Kalimantan border of Indonesia is only an hour away we were told but we were too exhausted and the weather threaten to rain so we decided to settle just for the waterfall .Yuyah, headman of the village became our guide. We slipped a few times as the trails were not marked but the fall was rewarding. The sound of water crashing on the rocks from a distance kept us going.We took a dip and massaged our back with the falling water. None of us except Sophie and Li Fay had our bathing suit on but what the heck. When nature calls you just can't resist.

Nature's own reward

The real service only began after we trekked back to the headman's house. We started preparing and cooking for the villagers there. I learnt that this what the Sai Association do all the time. Cooking for the entire village. We all took turns to cut the long beans, washing the XXXL sized wok and also handling the oar which does require some skills.

The village kids helping us to prepare food

Sophie having a go with the cooking oar

The bamboo decks that is common for all the houses there. From here you could view the greens or watch the sun go down


The boy who says Ho Ho Ho all the time

Around dusk, the generator was fired to provide electricity to the house. You might think this is weird but I've always felt like I've had a certain form of connection with it. The smell. The sound. It reminds me of old times. As the gas used for firing is rather expensive and difficult to transport, electricity was generally only used during the night for a few hours.

Shortly after dinner, the patients started coming in to the headman's house to visit the doctors. Generally , each patient has a card which is common for their visit in the local district clinic. Charlie Lau would register their names and then they proceed to see the doctors. The doctors here treat a variety of illnesses from a normal fever to even detecting the hand, foot and mouth disease (HFM) and giving them referral to bigger hospitals although most of the times they never go to town to visit the doctors. I fear their fate. Some of the illness were serious. They are ignorant but I wouldn't blame them entirely anyway. A trip to town would cost Rm60- Rm80 one way and would take almost three quarter of the day. For a family whose household income is probably not even RM500, that sum of money is inarguably a pinch.

Dr.Khai attending to a patient

Chun Wei & me preparing medication for a patient

The portable pharmacy =)

They then proceed to me to get their medicines dispensed. The portable pharmacy that is maintained by the association was indeed complete. I remember clearly a fragile old man who could barely walk and had blue ring around his iris extending out his hand after I dispensed his medicines to him. It didn't occur to me that he wanted to thank me and again he touched the back of my hand and that was when I understood his gesture. That genuine warmth touched my heart =)

The clinic ended around 10pm and we were told to get ready for bed as the generator would be shut off. That night all the girls had the privilege to sleep on a mattress in a private room in the second floor of the house. A sign that communicates respect for the guest. Poor people never lack perfect hospitality.

The next morning I rose early. Unable to sleep any longer. Birds chirping happily, rooster crowing at a distance and kids shrieking all over the place. I guess no matter which part of the world you are, some things just don't change- kids running around at early hours of the morning. Forget about bathing but since we had our refreshing shower under the waterfall, I didn't mind one bit. Well, I guess I could divulge a little information on the sanitation facilities available. Suffice to say that, you have to turn off your large bowel emptying habit for 2 days. You could take a leak and wash your face but you wouldn't want to spend any time longer in the shack built by them. They didn't seem to mind at all. So a shack. No biggie.We started preparing breakfast. Again for everyone. It's a wonderful feeling. Serving and feeding so many people in a short span of time.

Dr.Wong & Dr.Khai taking turn to cook overlooked by curious little kids

Jared & Li Fay

After breakfast, clinic continued till late morning. Soon it was time for us to bid farewell. We packed all our belongings and send all the supplies via motorcycle while we make our way down by foot under the blazing sun yet again. The walk down was hard on our thighs but was way much easier than the climb up the slope.

The hike down was made a little more bearable with my mp3 plugged in but I couldn't help to think that amidst all that poverty and hardship, all the families were perfectly alive and living decidedly in the moment; happy to be living the only life they know. This is where they were born, where they lived and where they would die eventually. Whether this was their choice or an unjust twist of fate,it didn't matter. No one questions such things. Only sheer acceptance that made me realise life here is at its simplest.

Making our way down

The kids followed us down for about one or two kilometer or so.

Beautiful ain't it?

I reached home totally exhausted around 2pm. Took a long shower and remember thanking God for the clean water and a comfortable place to empty my bowel. What a luxury compared to the life that I visited.

The rest of the day and two more days that followed, I just spent any free time I had sleeping away. The service drained me physically but not without giving me a little soul satisfaction. I would make a return trip elsewhere. Soon.

Radical honesty

2010-09-20T23:19:00.005+08:00

The earth is circle. Everything revolves.

I was outside the box then. At some point of time in the past,I tried to make sense of a dear friend's life misery, I did try to be there for her, tried to understand her. In that pursuit while putting my point across ,my well intention were interpreted wrongly and I wasn't well received. I wasn't as understanding.

I guess today I was exactly in that situation only here I was that dear friend who went through some life crisis sometime ago. It was just a reflective conversation that began just as any other normal conversation would but I never thought it would turn into a heart slicing hurt. Radical honesty isn't always a good thing especially when it is not politely uttered. Bluntly put, we just as any other individual in this whole wide world have no right to call anyone's action as right or wrong because given the model of the world a person lives in only he or she knows what she has been through and if there is only one person who can judge your actions that is only you.

Today that dear friend is outside the box. Her crystal clear eyes sees everything freshly and hence she made her observations and she told me .Well, having been through the situation myself and having to take that difficult decision especially when I know the implications of my reactions will leave a devastating impact on the affected party, I knew I could take her observations positively or negatively. I regard myself as someone who's always willing to consider people's point of view, to be able to put myself in another person's shoe. Well, this particular conversation I had with this dear friend, we have probably had it a few times. I guess today it was just the wrong choice of words. Words can be so hurting, can't they? And especially when it comes from a loved one, it just stings us a tad more.

Discovering my truth, I lived by it and I will stand by it because only the truth set me free. If I'm hence judged so be it.

A new found home

2010-09-01T18:38:00.005+08:00

I use to do it all the time when I was younger. Singing twinkle twinkle little star with that twinkle twinkle motion with my hands and blinking my eyes permanently and angling my head from left to right till the song ended. I never analyzed the words. Wait, I think I might even have sang it wrongly. :P ( especially the up above the world so high). I made up my own words. An honest confession after 20 odd years. It's funny how the line to a nursery rhyme striked me at the oddest of hours.

Twinkle twinkle little star,

How I wonder what you are,

Up above the world so high,

Like a diamond in the sky.....

I was taking the return flight back from KL to Kuching. Glancing out through the little pigeon sized window, I could see the blanketed navy blue sky. Then there was that hundreds of twinkling shining stars creating a polka dot like effect against it's backdrop. It bought bubbles in me. Tiny happy bubbles that made me smile from within. And I was lost just staring at it and before I knew I was wishing upon a star. Mother nature never fails to awe me. Somehow the trip back to Kuching this time wasn't particularly overwhelming. It was a funny feeling. It almost felt like I missed Kuching. Here I was flying back away from home where the heart was to just what I thought a temporary settlement but some faint feeling inside me gave away with disposition. I was in fact returning to an empty home. Later that night, lying on my bed, I was experiencing the height of beautiful tranquility. Embracing the silence peacefully. My mind was at ease and so was my soul. "I could die this moment just like that" I thought. I guess my dear friend Risha was right, " You've made a home for yourself in Kuching, that's why it feels so right. I have a new found home and it's really peaceful here.

In pursuit of truth

2010-08-22T00:34:00.008+08:00

Love and me. We are never on the same page. Ever since, I became aware of such attraction towards the opposite sex, I realized that I could not make it work. Oh wait let me rephrase it, make it happen. And when I finally did make it happen, the happiness was short lived or rather I killed it. And now here I am at the crossroads wondering if I took the right decision. The recent books that I have been reading ever since I came to Kuching have changed my life completely. Changed my perspective of viewing people. Changed my ways of decision making. And talking to God through his book Conversations with God has seriously enlightened me. It is as if I have taken that book as the Holy Grail, the Gospel Truth. God is that real. The book made a lot of sense though I can safely say I lack the wisdom to decipher it entirely and I’d bet my last dollar that I will reread the book again in 20 years time and have a totally different understanding towards the contents. The real purpose of a person to be born in this world is to experience and know himself. Period. Your actions, decisions, feelings and emotions are all undertaken by you in the pursuit of knowing who you are. There is no right or wrong in this world. Everything is just as it is. And none of these entire events happened by accident or coincidence. You life’s actions are a mirror image of what you want your life to be.

A broken heart. Everyone has had one.

In pursuit of knowing myself, I too undertook a major decision to break someone’s heart. Someone’s very good heart. Hurting anyone under any circumstance is wrong. I’m not here to justify myself or my actions but God was right in his book to say that the first person whom you should take care of at anytime be it when you’re in a relationship with others or not, is yourself. How can you try to love another when you have not loved and know yourself.
2 months into my relationship, I had doubts about how I felt about him. It sprung out of nowhere and it just stayed there silently. The irony of it, the silent voice could be heard even at the loudest of moments. But as humans as we are, ignorance is bliss and what we don’t confront we don’t have to deal. Well, the mere fact that the voice existed troubled me because I knew I had to do something about it. I’m not a watcher. I’m a doer. It sent alarming signals in me. I bought time for another 4 months. Then I just couldn’t anymore. I knew this is one thing in life that I must do now otherwise I’d be stuck somewhere in the future wishing I had made this decision way long time ago but it would be too late then. Putting myself in his shoe, I would say it could have been one of the biggest blow in his life. Having to have found that love that you thought you are going to spend the rest of your life with only to suddenly saw it all shattering away. No amount of words uttered from me would have given him the solace that he needed. It wasn’t fair at all. No explanation was the right explanation but I had to do it for the sake of love. In this case for the sake of his love.
Truth was that I never did love him as much as he loved me. He would always tell me that his love for me grows everyday and I always find myself wondering why I couldn’t reciprocate the same way but my actions and emotions never gave away. I convinced him. I stayed on. Not because everything that we shared was a lie. While I was at it, I was genuine. It was because sometimes when you realise certain things you don’t just want to run to your partner and break things off suddenly. You do the usual. Try to fight it yourself. Hang in there till you can. That’s what I did. I gave me, him and the relationship a chance. I wanted to make it work because I knew love grows with time. I wasn’t attracted to him in the beginning, he knew this too but there were many qualities in him that I liked. He was a great talking companion, a real mature one, many ways smarter than I was and he knew how to treat a woman right. You see no one enters a relationship to not want it to work. The mistake that I made was to make him believe that I truly loved him when I wasn’t sure of my feelings myself. I am to be blamed. Hell yes but it is my first relationship ever and having been rejected by love many times in various ways, I succumbed to it finally thinking that yes maybe I deserve to be with someone who loves me more than I love him but I guess that is not enough for me because I need to love and that mattered more. I’m not guilty of choosing the decision to break the relationship but in doing so breaking his heart killed me too. Here I was having the love that I always wished I had, the kind of love every girl dreams of and yet I had to throw it away because staying with him and leading him on to believe that the love I gave was in its purest and highest form was not the right thing to do.

Love is not about staying on with the person because that person is the best. My mum said love should not be a compromise. How I came about making that decision did not matter because to the eyes and ears of some of the people I know, they believe I was influenced by what my friends or my mum had said but still the fact that I took that decision only reinforces the truth. If love was really strong, I would have stayed on and fought. I'm a rebel. Always have been.
The fact that I was in a way compromising my parents’ happiness came as a blessing in disguise. I know I’m mean to say this but it was like as though it had to happen for me to take that major decision to silence that voice forever. For me to love, I need to love fully, wholly, undyingly and unconditionally. I needed that to add soul into my life. It is everyone’s God forsaken right to love and be loved. I was truly loved but I couldn’t return the love the same way to this particular person. I don’t know why. There are no answers to these kind of questions. A few years ago, I was at the exact same spot, only I was in his shoe. I used to wander “I could be the best he can ever get, yet he doesn’t want me”. Today I realise that it has got nothing to do with me or him or how we could be the best for the other person. It is about that feeling in your heart or the lack of it. I guess I thought I had it all figured out except that I didn’t.

I do not know if you would stumble upon this but I truly apologize for breaking your heart. I wish it never happened but someday if you could find it in your heart to forgive me, I’d be here to receive you as a friend because yes I truly do feel your loss as a friend. And maybe you were right I just loved you as a friend. Being a person who always takes friendship to the deeper levels of the heart, I think I did just that with you but I confused it with love. I’m truly sorry for making you believe otherwise. I’m guilty of building hopes, dreams and the future together with you only to ruin it in the end without any warning. I do not regret not even for a day of having you in my life for those brief moments we had together. I think you had to come to teach me one of my life’s greatest lesson. Then I had to cause you to leave by leaving you. Maybe someday you will realise it. Just like I did. I wouldn’t know if I could find another person who would love me the same way you did. Maybe there isn’t one. Maybe this kind of person only comes once in your life but if I could find that person whom I can love then life’s worth it. And if I don’t then I just have to live with the consequence of being alone without a love to love rather than being in a relationship with a love without being in love. I pray that it doesn’t have to happen to either of us again.

The Wall is a Good Motivation

2010-08-05T23:02:00.005+08:00

Yet another hour of dismay at the pool today following yesterday's vain effort to practice my swimming skills. My spirits were high but my body refuses to follow through. I sink, drink and swallow. You Tube videos can be a real sabotage. They make swimming look so easy. Hell no. It is not easy to kick, breathe, float and move all at the same time. Why don't water just readily have oxygen supply so that we don't have to go up to for air. I think if water generally have oxygen reservoir , I could win the Olympics. Ok, that's massive exaggeration but I can actually swim underwater, I just can't go up for air and come back down and swim beautifully. Why? Oh why mum, didn't you send me for swimming classes when I was young. Or why didn't you just throw me in the water and miracoulously believe that I will somehow come up alive and by default learn swimming myself. =(
It is not easy being 26, just attempting to learn how to swim and surrounded by showing off swimming kids who gives you "what is she doing" kind of weird glances. Nop. Not easy. But seriously, who cares. I just want to swim. I want to feel that priceless feeling. This is what I tell myself all the time. Every time I try to breathe, I forget to kick. And if manage to move and kick, I don't breathe. On a more positive note, I can swim. I really can. Just that I can't go more than 5 meters because my synchronization is so off. Everyday for 5 days now, I put on my swimsuit, the shower cap and my goggles and my if you've never seen my all over the place clumsy swimming moves, you would really think I'm a professional swimmer because I really, I mean I really do have that swimmer's aura exuding out.
Well, you could ask why sweat. Just learn it from professional swimmers. Err..how do you think I got here. I can never swim. But ever since I got transferred to Kuching, I attended a few classes at the local swimming pool with a cool coach ( She thinks I'm funny when I tell her that I'm drowning). And though she's cool, she says things like "Err, what are you doing? Were you even moving? Hello, I didn't learn swimming at the age of three like you did. Cut me some slack will you. Doesn't she know that negative reinforcements won't get anywhere but kills a students' motivation. I hate that. She has it so easy. Sometimes I think she's a show off.
You see while I was suppose to be focusing on swimming or kicking or breathing, my mind would wander (trust me, swimming is that relaxing) and I would have interpersonal communication with myself. Communication such as What to eat for dinner or what will happen in Glee today. Sometimes I water dream. Like day dream you know. I dream that I swim like a fish. And most of the time, even before I could join competitions in my dream, my coach would interrupt me because I'd be sinking or moving sideways. (Oh, Did I also mention that she says my name wrongly and differently all the time) So it came to a point that every time I went for class, she just made me practice the moves I know but she sometimes makes me not so happy in that embarrassing kind of way. You get it.
So in another one of my water dream session, I dreamt that I came back to her only to show her that I can swim so well. She beams of pride that her oldest student has graduated. Dreams that is. In reality, I then decided that I should take the matter into my own hands and I sort of made a promise with my coach saying that I'll be back after perfecting my freestyle moves. And I guess that's a long way coming. Sigh. There's a burning desire to get to the other end of the pool. So near yet so far. To swim from here to there. That will keep me going.
Thomas Alva Edison failed 900 something times right? before he successfully invented one light bulb right. I'm this close to my success and I shall not give up.

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. Thomas A. Edison

Midnight Adventure to Damai Beach

2010-06-20T22:23:00.004+08:00

This would be a beautiful memory of Kuching. The one that you could look back in 20 years from today, smile and say " Yeah, that was one crazy spontaneous night" We (the Preethi & Jivanti team) had our regular dinner out which was pretty uneventful then just headed home when I decided in dismay and said " I can't believe that we are already driving back home." So I turned back and we decided to have coffee at a rather cozy coffee place in Kuching call Bing's Coffee. The kind of place where you have that home kind of feeling. We had a great time talking ( we always have great time talking) and laughing. We took some pictures, shared an orgasmic brownie and I had my favourite Caramel Machiato.

Soon they decided to close Bing. Of course coffee shops are not emergency department of hospitals to be opened 24/7, so we left. But still I guess both our souls were thirsty for a journey so I said rather spontaneously "Let's drive to Santubong and go to the beach" and just as I said that, we had great background music from the VTV movie. It was 12.02am. Maybe this journey was cosmically called for. We drove along the quiet road that lead us to Damai. Driving really fast and sometimes overtaking the car in front of us. The roads were dark but I guess because of the company I had, it still remained very friendly. We sang along sometimes rather loudly to words of the songs we knew. And finally reached our desired destination. How beautiful. The slapping sound of the waves was so soothing to the ears and we rejoiced. Only because we reached and were totally stepping on the soft beach sand. We gave each other a happy hug and ran along the mouth of the waters screaming wildly. The beach tends to do that to you.

The only thing missing was a chilled can of beer. We hanged around for quite a bit untill I received an order via sms to return home:D. Before leaving, we stared into the beach and thanked the cosmos for still keeping us together after all the shit we went through. Life is beautiful if you could hang around for a bit I thought. We drove back the same journey, rewinding the same songs and sang the same lines again. I'd totally miss this someday. Probably am already missing it. Soon, I'll be alone here in Kuching when Preethi leaves to KL for good. But still it was an awesome adventure (like how Preethi refers to it, an adventure).

MOS

2010-06-18T10:13:00.008+08:00

I remember that van used to haunt me. I remember I use to hide in toilets when they came to look for me (hence the sweet escape...oooo.oooo) but looking back I realize I had nothing to fear. Maybe it was because they were all dressed in white and in the pit of your stomach you know the friendly ride is not a fair view of the destination at all because the terminus end is a real scary one with lots of weird looking tools, sharp objects that generates lots of blood. As an eight year old, those were my only vivid imagination. Or maybe the imagination of just any 8 year old child. Children hates dentist. Period.

Fast forward. About maybe 18 years later. Right. So here I am in the dentist office. I really can't remember when was the last time I visited the dentist but hey I managed 18 years without any tooth decay, carries, crowning or filling. 18 years. I feel like a federal fugitive only I wasn't wanted. You know how they say the greatest way to overcome your fear is by facing them. I'm doing that now. So I congratulated myself for being brave and allowed myself to gloat in glory for some good moments for being so courageous after nearly two decades of running.

I glanced around me looking at the rest of the patients in the waiting area. Well, they all look indifferent. No one looks like they have chosen to visit the dentist. It was more like they just had to be there. But me I was different. I made that difficult choice. This only boosted my ego and I even smiled rather proudly. I was zapped back to the reality after having heard a nurse called my name. I walked in the room. Ok, seriously I must have that shitting bricks petrified look on my face because the two nurses and the doctor who attended to me was flashing that kind, 'Don't worry everything will be fine' smile. So the doctor who would be known as Dr.C attended to me rather professionally (At least he managed to give me that impression until proven otherwise later, we'll get there shortly) and asked me the relevant questions.

Then he decided I should have my teeth X-rayed and he told me he will show it to me later . Wow, this is like taking a photo in a studio and you get it delivered to you instantly. This visit is not that scary after all. The teeth X ray is rather cool but in a weird way. It has like a body and a head. The body and head is connected via a tube which has a hollow end. And the hollow end has another connective wire which has a square sensor wrapped with plastic ( I think they only have one sensor and they just exchange the plastic for every new patient. This sensor goes into the designated to be X-rayed area inside your mouth which got me into thinking what if the plastic has a hole and no one realizes it or what if while in the mouth the plastic just comes out and the sensor actually touches surface of the mouth ~~saliva and bacteria~~. Anyway, the body stays outside your check and once the plastic wrapped sensor is in your mouth. Then everybody runs away and you'll hear. Ok, shoot. Then about 10 seconds later, you look to your right and see the digital image of your teeth. Whether you will like it or not is a secondary issue.

Well, the main reason why I decided to go to the dentist is because I'm just wiser. ( I mean after so many years of running, I have confronted my fear, so it must mean I have grown a little wiser right? ) My wisdom tooth has tried to grow many many times and has failed miserably because my gum is just too crowded. And every time it tries to grow, there's just a lot of pain and dining difficulties. The real honest reason was that the previous night I was awaken by a sharp pain at my two frontal teeth. Who gets pain at the front teeth? Apparently, I do. So this maddening fear was the root of my sudden bravery. Dr.C then tells me that under his judgment my wisdom tooth is ought to be extracted. Apparently that digital image of my teeth showed that there is some distal angulated impaction. Which plainly means that the teeth has no place to grow and instead of growing tall it has been stumped and to compensate for the depression it has been suffering it had decided to grow sideways and gotten really friendly with some bacterias.

Then he asked me if I need time to prepare myself for the extraction. And before my brain could even start thinking, my lips betrayed me instantly and said 'No problem. We can do it today. ' Later I would learn through the hard way that maybe some form of preparation would be necessary. Pain is the best teacher.

Here's where the real horror starts. The tools. The scary tools which comes in different sizes and shapes. After reassuring me that the local anesthetics (LA) would take off all my pain, he takes out a syringe which has a needle as long as my index finger attached to it.(Please note : I have a rather long index finger and I'm not exaggerating) , he says 'I'll give you two shots of this.' He smiled kindly again. The first one will hurt he said and the second one won't. And he poked me. Well more like he attempted at different sides to poke me. Kinda like playing testing. And I just wanted to scream. Hello, can you not be so fickle minded and poke at just one place? The LA was beginning to kick in and I felt weird because for the first time I felt my lips and mouth was numb. Then Dr.C began working. Oh did I mention that he took a rather long time like as long as 45 minutes to extract one tooth which he failed after many improvised attempts. Each time using a different tool or approach from a different angle. But it just didn't work. My tooth is apparently extraordinarily strong and this has halted Dr.C in successfully trying to extract it. You see the LA was only given to the left hand side of my mouth since the tooth to be extracted was a left tooth and when he was trying his best and rather trembling at the attempt to pull it, it meanwhile rather logically exerted excruciating amount of pressure on the right side of my mouth and the entire right side of my face and I was wincing in pain and gripping the dental chair so tight that at one point he decides to say 'Relax. Relax'. You got to me kidding me man, how am I suppose to relax if you're inflicting so much of on pain on me. Finally, he does the right thing. He gave up but not without blaming my still strong tooth and said "Saya panggil boss".

Boss came and to my utter horrible surprise he says . "This one you should do MOS. How can you just pull?. `-Shakes Head Disapprovingly- How many LA did you give? Only 2? ~Shakes head again. What? What's MOS? You mean all this while Dr.C has been inflicting so much of pain on me because he did it all rather wrongly? And the real one to blame here is not my tooth but his rather lack of skill. =( How could you Dr.C? I trusted you. Boss then proceeds to give me another LA shot from the long needle and then requests for some tools, puts on his blue jumpsuit and in less than 5 minutes extracts my tooth out. And I only realize it was out the moment I saw it on the tray. There was no pain!!!!!! Dr.C I could so murder you. Then Dr.C comes back again with no sign of remorse on his face and nonchalantly told the nurse "Suture." Ok, so now he's gonna sew my gum up.

Well, at this point I was praying to God that he would at least do this one thing right since it's going to be the first suture of my life. The feeling is kind of funny. Someone sewing inside your mouth. Then he declares "It's done. You wait outside. I will give you an appointment date and your prescription. So after waiting about 15 minutes he comes out and hands me the prescription. I was busy fumbling for another important document. Then I looked at him rather strangely and asked him "Doctor, no MC? And he went like "Oh, you want MC? You're working?" Duh!!!! Hello, weren't you even listening in there? You asked me how long I've been working here remember??? And for all the intense pain you have caused me, I damn well need MC.

I calmly replied. "Yes doctor, I need MC." After another 15 minutes of waiting again, he comes out and hands me a day of MC. Only after I reached my office, I learned that the rest of my colleagues who went for tooth extraction received 3 days of MC without having to ask, antibiotic, pain killers and swelling reducing medicines. And Dr.C only gave me Panadol. Sigh. And MOS means minor oral surgery. I went for a freaking surgery and I was not given MC until I asked for it. Seriously, what was this doc even thinking?? Or maybe he wasn't thinking.

Fast fast forward. 3am today. 2 days after extraction. I was awaken by the sharp pain in my mouth. Seriously, why did you even get it extracted in the first place? Was it that bothering? This is totally uncalled for. I went to down to gulp some milk and pop in another 2 pain killers. And I got up late today swearing. Technically, I'm suppose to be on MC today.

Witnessing a mention

2010-01-06T00:05:00.005+08:00

I went to the court somewhere last month. And this post was suppose to be up here sooner but alas time wasn't on my side. Yes, I was very excited. It’s like that ‘going to the zoo’ kind of feeling only that it isn’t a zoo at all. Well since I have not received my letter of authorization from the deputy of public prosecutor, (The letter that basically gives me the order to prosecute people who go against the law), I was a mere spectator. My first ever visit to the court.

Ok, here’s the thing. If you've not been to a court before, be WARNED because you’ll be

a) Disappointed because the court you see in reality is nothing like the one you see LAW & ORDER or Ally McBeal (The Lawyers aren't cute and some look like they've not eaten for days. No pun intended to the profession.)

b) Blur because everyone there talks softly and you can barely hear the proceeding that is going on

c) Confused because you see many people walking in out of the court room constantly and this does not bother the judge one bit.

So why am I in the court you may ask? Currently, I’m a drug enforcement officer. That directly translates to a pharmacist in the public service whose job scope includes works pertaining to legislation, regulation, licensing, and law enforcement which comes with a lot of paper work as well as field work. It’s an entirely different working environment altogether, a little far from the real practice of the rational use of drug in a hospital setting. So as a drug enforcement officer, I play many different roles which allows me to be an investigator (i.e the interrogator) , a raiding officer, a prosecuting officer (i.e the lawyer who represents no one but the interest of the public) and also a licensing officer.

So the mention (means kes disebut di mahkamah) was set to begin at 9am. Thirty one minutes past nine am, one cool judge arrives fashionably late with a cute smile. Very Malaysian. I know. Don't people keep to time strictly here? Well, apparently not. The judge looked well not bad looking at all. He appeared very charismatic, intelligent and very cool. His hair was his alone as I spotted no wig and he was in a well tailored black suit and did not wear that hideous black robe you see judges in the tv wears. ( I know I was not suppose to checkout judges but seriously I mean waiting for 31 minutes got me really bored.)

So the court. A boring place if I must define. Uptight. Lack of activity. Of course it isn’t a market. The setting was pretty much standard just like the ones you see in TV. So I go in and sit behind the cage you know where the accused stands. Yes, I had that feeling like I was the family members of someone who have been accused and I was just looking. Every little movement in the court attracts my attention. Remember I’m attentive and it’s my very first time ever so I wanted to know who is who. At the end of the day, to my dismay I realised the only two person I manage to identify was the judge and the accused. You see the few pages of the “Criminal Prosecution in Lower Courts” that I manage to read successfully without falling asleep, did not draw out the interior plan of the court and saying who’ll be seated where.

So there were about four to five people in front of the judge. One lady whose face was blocked by the 19^th century computer, so I really don’t know how she looked. I later learned that she’s the typist. Next to her was another middle aged lady who was half of the time yawning and looked really sad like as though she has the worst job in the world. She’s the interpreter and next to her was a bald guy who looked like a thug. He kept going in and out of the court and I was rather distracted by this because it disturbs my concentration you see. This guy his exact title I could not make out because he seems like he’s rather in power but he only says one word at a time like “Exhibit A1, Sanction, Police Report, Sanction” to the Prosecuting Officer(PO) i.e me in future.

Bald dude has a helper or maybe his colleague whose main task is to walk around the court taking documents or case evidences from PO and delivering it to bald dude who will then deliver it to the judge or going over to the accused and reading their charges and ask them “Setuju? Betul?”

I think the helper is rather an important person unlike the bald guy who goes out for smoke breaks off and on, this one stays and delivers.

Finally there was another lady whose job is to read out cases mentioned... “Like Langit AK Biru (please do not laugh. Such names exist here in varieties) versus Smart Trading CO Sdn Bhd. For someone who looks like she belongs to the court for a long while, she fails her job miserably because she too whispers and when she does actually speak, it only comes out as muffles and all I could hear was Versus....Trading...Sdn Bhd. Sometimes she giggles. I had no idea what was funny.

This particular mention that I witnessed was attended by many lawyers. None of them was cute. Sad. I know. And they keep going in and out of the courtroom as they please and it disturbed me again. Hello people I’m trying to concentrate here. I was so attentive that I nearly fell of my chair because I was really trying my best to hear what was being mentioned. You know like when you have your ears pressed against the wall when you want to hear something so badly. Only here there was no wall. I mean isn’t that what mention is all about. Hello, MENTION. No one was mentioning. Everyone was just mumbling or whispering.
I later learned that at any session court where cases are being mentioned, many cases will be mentioned at one time which explains the many lawyers. Initially I thought all the lawyers there were representing the accused for the case that my colleague was prosecuting. And I was thinking ‘why does he need so many lawyers?’

So as soon as you’ve mentioned the case, if the accused is present, he can plead guilty (PG) or claim to be tried to prove his innocence. In the latter, he hires a defence council who will defend him to win the case and another date will be set for them to be present in the court. This is call a trial case and it’s a hearing now. (Not mention anymore)

The line “Will the defendant please rise” will never be heard probably because we never have juries. So the judge basically just calls out the name of the accused. Langit AK Biru (He says something and I can’t hear it).....Guilty as charged..A fine of RM8000 ..failing which (more missing words).... 2 months imprisonment. And he doesn’t have that small rubber hammers that judges have to hit and say “Court is adjourned”.

The judge then later gets up, flashes another one of his cute smile and vanishes behind the door he came in. If not for the pleasant looking judge, my first court experience would definitely be a bore.

2010. Sarawak Style New Year

2010-01-01T02:00:00.012+08:00

This I shall make it a yearly affair. I mean I thought I did but when I read my entries in the past year, I realised I did not do any virtual penning down of how I spent my New Year in the year 2009. And thanks to my goldfish memory, I have no recollections whatsoever at all even though I have rummaged through the entire RAM of my mind. Clicking files after files. Nop, didn't find anything there.I thought I was with my dad on New Year's day in his ashram but I learned that through my entry on 01.01.2008 that it was indeed the year 2008 and not 2009.

So its 2.07am on 01.01.2010. Precisely 4 hours ago I was on my bed. Alone under the covers thinking that solitude in the current way experienced was an indeed a blissful way to spend New Year, not knowing that the best things in the world are always outside and it's always free. Earlier a 2 minute telephone conversation with my best friend, the great Bern ended with her giving me an advice. Get out. Just go. Find the crowd. Sit with them. Sarawak is a beautiful place to meet people she says. Hanging up, I was contemplating. It was already 11pm. And I haven't showered. And besides I don't even know where to find the crowd. Yada. Yada. Yada. Reasons. I was just lazy. The covers were too warm. Truth is I know exactly where the crowd is gonna be. I mean its Kuching afterall. There could only be one place where the bulk of the city's population would choose to be at any given occasion. Big or small. And that was a no brainer.

I took a quick shower and left shortly. 15 minutes later I was stopped by a cop. A road block. I know why I generated interest. My car has the alphabet B attached to it. You know B cars are out of the norm in Kuching. And he was like " Cik, orang KL, buat apa di sini?" I find myself having an internal monologue. "It's a free world dude. Why can't I be here? Did I even ask you why you are here???" Instead I replied rather cheerily " Saya kerja sini. Selamat Tahun Baru." And I asked him where I could watch the fireworks. And he confirmed my no brainer location.

I was so wrong. The moment I saw the crowd. I felt this instant euphoric feeling and I was smiling. This is where I belong. With the people. I mean really who was I kidding? Thinking that the solitude under the covers of my bed at home is the best way to celebrate New Year. The no brainer location was just awesome. It's the Riverside cum Waterfront by the way. A area where you take a stroll along the Sarawak River. The wind always blew ever so softly and the place is lit up at night and there are cafes just along the river where you can just sit and chill.

I didn't bring along my camera because I didn't want to snap. I just wanted to be at the moment and feel it. And so I walked or rather strolled along the river side walk. The people were plenty. Some with families, some with lovers, some with weird hairdo and even weirder clothes, some with a Santa hat and a fake beard. I loved these people. These strangers. I felt like I was one of them and I'm pretty sure I was walking around with a little smile on my face. And then there was the street foods. The smell of pop corns and kebab. I treated myself to a Burger Special which I thought was a little expensive for the Kuching standards but I thought heck it's New Year and this is a "prime" location. I had a bottle of Kampai with me. But didn't have a bottle opener and I asked the burger stall dudes to open it for me. The moment they saw the word alcohol on the bottle, they were giving each other glances and smiled at me weirdly. Yeah. Dudes. Whatever. They failed. I thanked them and dump the unopened bottle back in my bag and continued walking.

And then the firecrackers happened. Right in front of me on the other side of the riverbank. I just watched it eating my expensive burger. It was good actually. Going all oohhh and ahhhh like as though it was my first time ever seeing it but then again I tend to do it all the time. But there were no blue ones this time. The blue ones are my favourite. Then I made some phone calls. Spoke to people who makes me happy and when I couldn't get them on the line, I sent them emo messages. Kuching brings out the sappy side of me at times. Haha. I'm sorry. I just can't help myself. The night was just too beautiful not be shared with. I mean come on. Picture this. You see the reflection of the entire city in the flowing river which is so calm with a perfect undisturbed rhythm. Then there's the moon. The occasional small ferry as the imaginative locals call it( In reality: It's a perahu with wooden oars and white fluorescence light hanging in it) in the middle of the river going from one end to the other. The wind blows occasionally and somewhere far you hear the strums of a guitar. How can you not share this with your loved ones?

Having failed with my Kampai bottle, I thought I'd settle for a cuppa tea instead which again I thought was a little exorbitantly priced. I keep forgetting it's the location. Still looking out into the beautiful night, I sipped it slowly thinking New Year this year was differently. Something about knowing that I was not alone amidst all the unknown strangers gave me a sense of belonging to this place.

So thats' how I celebrated the coming of 2010. Sarawak style.

I'm not gonna recollect my memories for the year 2009 and I do not want to make any more resolutions. I have already credited myself as the person who when knows what she wants will go all out to achieve it but I have written down somewhere the things that I want to do not necessarily this year but I have to accomplish it somehow. Suffice to say that it has been a hell of a year. Both good and trying as well. I've grown as a person more this year than I ever had in my entire life and I found myself surrounded by beauty. Beautiful people and beautiful places. I'm blessed in this way. Well I think God is kind of cool in a biased way because He makes all these beautiful events in my life happen. I've realized for a long while now that I stopped asking God for things. I simply thank Him. And He keeps giving these days.

The year 2010 will I'm sure bring its own collection of memoirs. In a way, knowing the unknown is about to unfold is anticipatively appealing.

Have a happy New Year everyone. Cheers.

Parcelled love from my Santa mum

2009-11-26T23:48:00.008+08:00

Sitting down alone on the clean tiles of my empty house was where I found love in the most peculiar way.

Earlier that day, a call from a random stranger made my day. Earlier than that the same day, I sent a text to my mum which sounded quite like this... (just because I felt like it)

" Hi, Ma, I've been trying to reach you since yesterday. Just called to say" I love you very much" and I don't know what I'll do without you. I think you should be given the award for 'the world's best mum'. It's only when I'm here I realized how much I miss you and the entire family. Please forgive me if I've hurt your feelings in the past. And thank you very much for everything you've done for me. It's a small word that can't be compared to everything that you've done for me. I hope someday I'll be as strong, independent and self sufficient as you. I love you, ma =). Hugs.

This was sent as early as 8am in the morning.

And as usual I did not receive any reply from my mum. This is due to multiple factors such as
a) She doesn't realize that she has received a text and on most days she would suddenly stumble upon it one week later and hence reply one week later.
b) Her phone is deeply buried in her handbag alongside all the other rubbish (as how I say it) inside her bag
c) Her phone went on silent mode by itself since she doesn't even know such a feature call "profile" in her phone
d) She just doesn't reply and when questioned she would give all the other reasons mentioned above.

Ok, here's the part where I need to elaborate about my mum. She's one of a kind. I mean which mum isn't but she doesn't belong to the typical mum/woman clan. Sometimes I feel she's half a man and I think I'm sort of getting it from her.

Reason being:

1) She's hardcore (in my entire 25 years of living, I've only seen her cry 4 times, ),

2)She's super independent and physically strong ( her 15 year old manual, non-power steering proton car breaks down on busy road every month or so and she handles it all by herself without calling my dad and she doesn't complain about it at the end of the day when we are sipping our tea and I'm complaining about patient A saying this and that and colleague B pushing her work to me and when I do ask finally after all my rants, she would nonchalantly " My car broke down again in Federal Highway and I waited for 2 hours for the mechanic and the air con gave some problem as well. Everyone was hooting and I just couldn't be bothered. I had a book with me."
3) She also can fix curtain railings, DIY cabinets,light bulbs, wall plugs, some air lock stuff that has to do with the house plumbing system and many thing that men can do with no effort at all.

3) She DOES NOT nag. At all. I mean let's get real, where does she come from???? But really, she DOESN'T!!!!!

4)She's a jack of all trades and master of many. She could make you fall in love with her cooking and baking. Sewing is now her current career and she kicks ass here too, she massages well, she's so street smart and very self sufficient. GOOD PAIR of HANDS. I know. =)

5) She DOES NOT call when I'm out at whatever time it is doing whatever thing it was.

6) She DOES NOT make a fuss when I'm totally out having fun and don't come back home for three days in a row.

7) She's so selfless that sometimes I'm ashamed of myself for the petty things I do or say. One of the kindest person I've known to live with and love.

8) She DOES NOT worry about anything.Or maybe she just doesn't show it.

9)I could go on and on and on about her.

10) Ultimately she's the COOLEST mum ever and if I see GOD one day (that is my karma isn't sufficient to reach nirvana but adequate for a human rebirth again, I'd want her as my mum again and she should be married to my dad again too, I know you're not suppose to impose restrictions to GOD but I just can't help it)

11) Oh ya, my mum also RARELY calls me on the phone nor does she call my elder sister who has been working in Singapore for 4 years. Which now will not come as a surprise to you that my mother did not respond to my "tear inducing, heart melting' sms that I sent to her today morning. I on the other hand constantly call her and ask her "Why don't you call me?" and she would laugh and answer "Athan nee call panreye ayya" (which means you're calling me already, ayya) (Ayya here is a love term akin to dear or honey) and not a sweeper or helper like how some of you might think) and that is her answer everytime. She never calls although I remind her everytime I do. She shows her love differently. VERY DIFFERENTLY. She doesn't hug or kiss us. My dad gave me a peck on my cheek when I left for Kuching. Mum was as cool as ever. Dad said.."I will miss you Kuching girl". Mum said "Call me if you need anything".

So back to how I found love in a parceled box. That random stranger was the guy from the forwarding agent company which was suppose to deliver all the stuffs that my mum have packed for me from KL. I just remember dumping all my clothes in a big bag and told my mum to pack the world map too. And 2 weeks later, here I am unpacking all the things from the box. 6 boxes all together filled with food, kitchen utensils and clothes. One by one. All wrapped in white creeper paper and double taped. Unlabelled. Giving me that tinge of surprise and mountains of little anticipation everytime I unwrapped one parcell. It makes me feel like I have so many gifts from somewhere so far far way. Like Christmas. Only my Santa is my amma.

Somehow in that stillness of the night, I could feel love touching every corner of my heart as I unpack one item after another. It was as though the paper were made of love tree and when you touch them, you could feel them seeping into your skin. And I was making so many "Aww," sounds and many intake of deep breaths followed suit. Something about the whole experience was just overwhelming.

I'm blessed in many ways I can't possibly imagine and I count my blessings and thank the higher force everyday without fail. Sometimes I'd be so grateful that it makes me feel insecure like this happiness and gratification wouldn't last long. It's scary but I feel it. I have the best family in the world and this jungle of a city just made me realize that to a greater depth.

Ok, enough with the emo talk. On a less serious note, my dad told me that I could possibly build a family and feed two children for three months with all the supplies that my mum have sent me. He was right. =)

Journey to the East

2009-11-06T08:48:00.012+08:00

Never in my wildest of dreams I would have thought that 6 months from my last entry, I would be in a place far far away from home unable to bridge the geographical gap that's separating me from my loved ones. Here I am typing my entry in solitude from a house that is surrounded by a mini jungle. Never. Well what can I say the only dynamic thing in life is change.

At present, I'm in Kuching, Sarawak. The biggest state in Malaysia. I got transferred here for work purpose. I did not ask to be sent here. It was just my destiny to be here. Leaving home after shouldering many responsibilities, loving so many people and having so many friends did not make it any easier for me. But all the same, it was a fresh start somewhere new. Somewhere undiscovered. Somewhere surprising. I didn't mind experiencing it either. Well, little did I know that the journey is not going to be a smooth one, at least for the start.

Prologue

Some introduction about Sarawak. It is the largest state in Malaysia bigger than the combination of all states in Peninsular Malaysia. (Peninsular or Semenanjung is new word that I've learned to use). I've learned through a travel guide map that Kuching did not get it's name because there were a lot of cats. I mean lets be honest this thought would have crossed your mind. Really. It would have. In fact to be contradictory, through out my 10 days stay here I have not spotted one cat. Not a single one but the members of the canine family are plenty. So much so that I think Kuching should be renamed to Anjing ( I know its sounds crude) but no pun intended. Kuching was named after "Cochin" which literally means Port. Back in the olden days, Indians from India used Kuching as a port to trade spices during Brooke's time. I reckon the name evolved from . Cochin to Cuchin and ended with Kuching. Kuching is really clean and greeny. One of my favorite bit. There are trees everywhere and it helps to calm you down in the rare event of you actually experience stress!!!!!

End of prologue*******

Remember I told you about the road not being smooth. This was the initial big rock on the road.

No 382 Arang Road- The house that we were to live in

There was a look of bewilderment on my face the moment I laid my eyes on the house. Our house that we were going to stay. I mean. Seriously?????? Well that was my first impression. I have a valid reason. My housemate who scouted for the house while we were still in KL, well let me put it this way. Somehow my imagination and her detailed explanations of the house lost its coherency somehwere and hence the rude shock. It looked kind of dilapidated. Its paint worn down and it was surrounded by bushes and the local lalang everywhere. Apparently it is a safe neighbourhood but we have a barren land with a 3 feet high mini jungle growing on one side of our wall which given 5 years will turn into the Arang Road’s very own tropical rain forest and another neighbour on our left is a few youngsters from Penang whose house is even more diriter than ours. My neighbour's house is so filthy (see I think this paints a bad image of us since our house is next to them) that I regret having them as our neighbour though we borrowed his hose to clean our house. :D Point is he did not make use his hose. The inside of our house complimented well with the outside. There has been without doubt lizards party everyday as there were lizards poop everywhere in the window panes, wall and floor. By the way the lizards here are all L sized. There’s no S or M size. I used to not care of them back in KL because on rare days that I spot them in my house in Selayang, they ran even before I could do anything but here I just have to be AWAS all the time and the Sarawak lizards are gutsy creatures. Of course the first two days were the most depressing of days as we were having thoughts of finding a different place to stay as everyone who asks us where we are staying claims that “Wah, Arang Road. Jauh jugak bah. Agak dalam jugak ."

Our house wasn’t furnished at all and the first day we were crashing at another friends place and to be honest I felt like an illegal immigrant. I was even on the verge of jeopardizing my four year old friendship with that housemate of mine who scouted for the house. The end of day one was perhaps the most devastating of all. The fact that we were all so fickle minded and couldn’t decide on whether to stay put with that house or find a different place did not help either. As usual I conversed with God and I said ‘whatever said and done we need to have a home tomorrow. You got to get it right.” And by the evening of next day, we settled into house in Arang Road. Bought some furnitures and cleaned our rooms. That night, after a tiring day of cleaning, sleeping in the comfort of own rm200, 5 year warranty mattress felt like one of life’s L sized accomplishment. =) I have vowed to myself to make this house a home. At least bit by bit.

The exterior of the house

The exterior of the house after I've cleaned it all up by myself. Amazing right? =)

The initial depressing interior

After the cleaning, notice how it's shining. This was group work

My room, overlooking the mini jungle

Pardon

2009-05-07T22:53:00.016+08:00

I feel like a mere spectator. Watching the drama from afar. It involves me directly yet I’m only a supporting actress. An actresss,am I? I ask myself again and again how I could react this way, how I could pardon things, how I’m still closely in touch with the only person who was directly involved in this love play. It was no wrongdoing on her part. Things just happen. That is exactly how the drama unfolded in the first place. It just happened.

And when it did, it happened way too quickly. The initial blow left a devastating impact. Anything and everything that followed suit were just an extension to whatever injury that I suffered from the beginning. The time of recovery. Unknown. Worst still there was no noise. Only silent pain that have numbed my heart and tear duct. It just made me feel lifeless. I feel like I’m a robot. I function excellently during the day. I could even deceive you with the most gorgeous of smile but deep down I’m nothing but a dead soul.

I guess sometimes when you let someone into your life with all the good will and faith you have , you’d never have thought that there’s a greater force like the universe who has control over certain things that you have no control off. You think you’ll sail smooth till a heavy storm hits you. After the storm, you’re left with bits and pieces of your sail. And the bits and pieces are everywhere. But you know you have no choice but to pick up the remaining left bits and sail back to the shore. Because that’s how things should be and will be. You just can’t fight certain things no matter how much you want.

I guess I was never ready to let go. I knew we were never meant to be together. But I didn’t realize that I was merely hanging on to the friendship that we had as a substitute. The friendship was a comfortable one but now I can’t seem to be able to get back there though I really want to because it meant a lot me. I guess it’s something that I’ll never be able to accept for now that I was not so important as I thought I was even as a friend. A friend in my life who was the initial stranger in his life became the driving force for the miles of distance between me and him in mere seconds. I felt like a wet towel. Tossed aside. I felt my feelings and emotions wasn’t respected. It made me feel like all that never mattered and probably will never be.

Of course I was angry and hurt but now all that is left is just sadness and feeling of hopelessness.

Feelings don’t get returned. Love just happens. Friendship dies momentarily at least this is what I want to believe for now but life has to go on anyway. People around me thinks I’m some kind of Mother Theresa. They think I’m too nice to be in touch with the one source who is the root of all this misery. Yet I know I’m not faking it. I’m just not pretentious. That's how I feel and I just can't help it.

Co-incidentally I was browsing online and I came across an entry in Paulo Coelho's blog that summarises how I feel.

It’s very difficult. But there is no choice: if you don’t pardon, then you’ll think about the pain they caused you and that pain will never go away. I’m not saying that you have to like those who do you wrong. I’m not telling you to go back to that person’s company. I’m not suggesting that you start seeing that person as an angel or as someone who acted without any hurtful intentions. All I am saying is that the energy of hate will take you nowhere, but the energy of pardon which manifests itself through love will manage to change your life in a positive sense.”

I couldn't say anything more.

Finding inspiration

2009-03-09T01:32:00.011+08:00

Everything is within reach yet I couldn't muster that little courage to pick it up and get on from there. For sometime now, I has been this way. It's the begining which is so hard. I find myself searching blindly for some inspiration.

As far as this blog is concerned, the days of my life is at a halt. Ironically many things has happened. Passed. Events experienced. Lessons learnt. Acquaintance befriended. So much of unwritten memory which will soon be swallowed and forgotten with time which brings me here to pen down this particular moment of my life so I can make a memory out of it.

I'd say I'm one of those lucky person in this whole wide world who knows exactly what inspires me and somehow manages her way to connect with the inspiration. In my case, this inspiration came in the form of a male. A male singer to be exact. Jason Mraz. We even share the same initial. JM. We could only connect. =)

Just last Thursday, I've had an unforgettable experience of watching him perform live in KL. I have to say I had the time of my life. Isn't it funny how music plays a big part in our life. To experience life without it now would be unimaginable. So yes, my point is he's come to be a person whom I don't really know but became very fond of of late. He's one person who can put a smile on my face and give me the same 'morning sunshine against my skin' effect with just a song. After watching him perform, I was even more impressed with his cool, laid back and life's just wonderful the way it is demeanour. And then there's so much of positivity in his songs. So much truth in the lyrics. So many words that you can relate to and suddenly it is very inspiring now.

So there for now I found inspiration through a singer through his songs. If you know what inspires you, stick by it. Chances are that, if it manage to inspire you today, 10 years down the road, it will come in handy once again =)

I live you all with a little something from him...

Jason Mraz- Life is Wonderful

Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle Ha la la la la la life is wonderful Ha la la la la la life is meaningful Ha la la la la la life is wonderful Ha la la la la la life it is...so... wonderful

It is so meaningful,
It is so wonderful,
It is meaningful,
It is wonderful, It is meaningful
It goes full circle
Wonderful
Meaningful
Full circle
Wonderful

A New Beginning

2008-09-17T22:36:00.007+08:00

After what seemed like an eternity of ~~time wasting~~ waiting, the torment ended. I was awaken from my deep slumber at 11ish am to the authoritative voice of Jo saying "Call now'' .I got Johor. So I attended to the quick three step hygiene procedure and ran downstairs to call my future big employer. Kementerian Kesihatan Malaysia. But of course the whole world of pharmacy undergraduates would choose to call at the same time and after about 10 minutes listening to the same engaged dialling tone, I gave up. So I went about my other domestic responsibilities and was going to empty out the thrash outside around 2ish and decided to make a pit stop at the telephone once again and I just tried my luck with that "I'm so sure, I wouldn't be able to get through" thought in my mind but I did. And Mr. Osman's voice was soothing to my ear when he said "Jivanti ya, Hospital Kuala Lumpur. Lapor diri 3 October!!!!! And suddenly I was jumping out of joy. It was a good feeling actually. Well HKL was my first choice, but somehow after sitting at home for 4 months, I was suddenly hoping to set fresh maybe somewhere else in Malaysia but also contradictingly I had some overtime thinking about all the financial aspect of living away from home and not to mention the emotional turmoil I'd be subjected to leaving my loved ones behind. Finally, I came to a conclusion of infinite indecisiveness. And just left it in the hands of God. It turned out that He really places us where we function our best. Coming back to HKL.

How do I feel about it personally? It's like going back to someone familiar. Like an old friend whom you don't really like to visit but you have to. So I guess I'm stuck with this friend again. I later learned that 5 of other Bpharmers namely Jen, Julian, Foot Seng, QiYun and Kogi is gonna be there too. Yaay. It feels like a zoo trip with kindy friends =) and I heard someone whom I don't really fancy in HKL has left the place too. Double yaay. In a way, I'm really looking forward to this big step of my life what more when the reporting date is on my birthday. Here's a good sign. An experience I learn from the past from HKL during sem 8 attachment was that inadequacy belittles you in incredible ways. So I have learned from my past and have started to study. Of course I won't be a 100% prepared but this should cushion me against whatever blow that I'll sure receive. So all in all I have a good feeling about this and I'm gonna give my 100% ke arah menyumbang kepada komuniti di Kuala Lumpur though I'm not really pro government but I'm here to serve the people so who cares really. To all fellow Bpharmers, happy disembarking on a new journey.

P/s I realised I'm more productive when I'm happy. I attended to my domestic responsibilities at home today for 8 hours straight with no break in between.

Where's The One?

2008-08-28T15:16:00.007+08:00

I was watching Oprah just like every other day following the daily routine of waking up at noon to a cup of hot coffee and going on to fix breakfast or lunch or branch depending on what's available in the refrigerator and then settle myself in front of the magic box on the recliner( See now, I'm beginning to develop emotional attachment to this little brown leather furniture) for a feel good time of 2 hours!!!! Oprah then the Ellen show.

Oprah was featuring a segment on where to find eligible single man over the age of 30 in the United States. Great. This could be helpful only problem was the geographical location was somewhat restricted.

The odds of me getting to Salt Lake City in Utah, Arlington in Texas, Raleigh in North Carolina, San Jose in California or San Fransisco in San Fransisco ( which by the way is the 5 cities in USA where you can find smart, highly educated eligible bachelor) is rather predictably slim, I thought I would just sum up on what was said and discussed on today's show. The guests featured were authors of two books. and according to them if you are a single woman looking for love, the one or something along those lines, here's what you should do

1. You should look attractive with minimal degree of effort but in a rather provocative way. Hmm, not sure how to do that but that's definitely required even when you're just out on a Sunday morning while the whole town is sleeping just to get the papers.

According to Steve Santagati, the author of the book The Manual: Man, Sex and Love. A complete guide to female, Man are visual people. That's the fact and they're always looking. So if you want to play the game, you got to play by the rules. The Law of Attraction is very precise. He also says that men also like women in their most natural way. So if you're in the game, the rule of thumb is to look good but not with too much make up. Just natural but good looking.

2. How you feel on the inside is as important as how you feel on the outside. Your inner dialogue. Hmm, I'm not quite sure if this is gonna work for me. My inner dialogue well. Let's just say, they should be contained within the grey matters to avoid unnecessary conflicts but Steve says "When a woman walks into a room, he thinks her inner dialogue can be the difference between being approached and being ignored. He goes on to further say that " You gotta have that straight shoulder, head held up high and just got to transmit that " I'm hot. I feel good, I know I can have anything that I want" vibe outside. Ladies, good luck. :p

3. Woman should not be afraid to make the first move. Like assuming you see a possible candidate in a market (The market on Orpah was so really nice, I mean even the market looks eligible. Oprah says you're to strike up a conversation. Here's where I start to picture my house Pasar Borong and I'm thinking "Hmm, eligible bachelors here, come on, don't kid yourself ". Of course you don't have to introduce yourself and freak him out, you know probably you could say "Looks like the fish is not fresh today eh (Bat your eyelashes in a not so provocative way) or are long beans that short? ( I'm kidding. Refrain from saying that unless you want to be in his dumb blonde list.) So ideally he was to response "Yeah, you'll a little late. The good ones are all taken. He's talking about the fish by the way and those are French beans, honey!! and winks at you. I'm so and so by the way. I just live across the street. How come I've never seen you before?"

Ok so you don't know how to differentiate French beans and long beans. Who cares. They're just beans. But at least you know he's Alex and he lives across the street. Maybe next time, Alex and me can grow our beans together. Hehe.. Apparently that's exactly how it works there in that part of the American continent. Sadly, in the Asian context and even more the Malaysian context that just doesn't happen.

Steve's justification: Men too worry about being rejected as much as the woman. So when the woman approaches them, they feel good and they feel the starting big load has been eased and they can get to it rather easily.

3. Go to a hardware store because Steve says it's like an ocean with a lot of fish. Dear Steve, how shall I put it, "I'm not quite sure where is this local hardware store that houses plenty of eligible men is located". Ok, fine, lets broaden our perceptive of thinking. Just a place where you think you can meet a lot of blokes. The rule: DO NOT hang on the phone. Because if a fish sees you and wants to swim close to you, the radiation from your mobile phones would scare it away. Hehe... You get the drill. Interestingly enough another author responds to this subject of matter rather differently while still agreeing with Steve.

Kathy Freston, author of The One, says you won't find your soul mate unless you look inside yourself. Kathy says before finding that one person who is meant for you, you have to find peace with yourself which literally means accepting yourself who you are and more importantly loving yourself for the great person you are. It also means you taking charge and making that difficult decision of leaving someone (if you're in a relationship) when you know they have gone too far. She says if you've been dating jerks, abusers and alcoholics all your life, it meant you actually think they're ok and you can put up with them when rightly you should be treated better. She says everyone have a soul mate and what's even more interesting is that we have soul mates. Yes that's right. Plural. Different people come into our lives at different point of time in our lives to fullfill different things in our life. While you believe that when you were once in a dark relationship with a guy who made you cry buckets of tears years ago was a jerk, he was actually your soul mate when it initially started and longingly lasted. At some point of time. It's just that he was a soul mate for you then. Just then. So now it's not the end of your life if you've just been dumped by your boyfriend of 6 years or you've never dated anyone in your life. Give it a rest. The universe has a way of leading you to your another soul mate. They are plural. Remember that.

And finally how do you know if you've met the one. Kathy says "You're just drawn to that person and you just want to stay there and this person seems to bring out the best in you.

My verdict: Well chances of me running to an eligible bachelor in my neighborhood on a Sunday morning is absolutely nil for three apparent reason.

1) First just like any other day, on Sundays the day too dawns at noon for me.

2) The Sunday newspaper is ~~thrown~~ delivered from the motorcycle right to my front porch.

3) The neighborhood near the shops where I usually get sundries stuffs are populated with immigrants wearing sarong having teh tarik from various nationality which I'm not keen to know.

P/S Yeah, I agree with Kathy of course. =)

Deep Down

2008-08-24T00:22:00.005+08:00

I guess this feeling of inadequacy is just too overwhelming almost to a point where I just can't overlook it probably because I have tried so much in the past to ignore it and in the past managed it in some way but today is the day where all I could do is sigh.

How I wish life would once treat me fairly. Isn't it ironic how too much ecstasy can suddenly throw you to that same amount of devastating despair afterwards. I had a little too much of too good time with my dose of antidepressants. =) Here I am now feeling it time and again after the effect of the drug worn off. Ah, almost like Mr.Deja Vu giving his timely visits.

I mean since I'm already here I might as well state explicitly what drove me here. This anti depressants they are my girlfriends from high school whom I can never find a substitute for. Never ever. It's they who brings out the best in me . The ones who knows me inside out but never judges me. The one who doesn't give two hoods about my psychotic behavior which the world has no idea about. The one everyone needs. But sadly and now even rightly today they manage to highlight the feeling of inadequacy in me. I've always thought of myself as someone who has a very high self esteem. Well today I learned that the hard facts are the ones that you never really hear about, never want to hear about although you know it and only those closest to you have the courage to tell you and whatever gigantic mountainous self esteem I had didn't quite prepare me for that although I wasn't highly affected.

You know how they say money doesn't buy happiness. But today it felt like it would have bought my happiness, made a difference and did justice to how I felt. Being in a ring of friends who have if not all but at least a car, an apartment or a bf , or a perfect husband or enough cash to buy you instant gratification at a shopping mall. Some even have it all. And look at me, I'm still waiting for a job that could leave me at a blur depending on the place that I'll be sent to, literally broke with no car and depend on the unreliable public transportation for my mobility and if all this is not enough I'm convinced that I'm doomed to wander this planet alone and that I'll never find that someone who's meant for me.!!!!!I can't help but to let all this get to me.

Hey, don't judge me on my maturity now. You ask me. Hey,do you not know there's more to life than material pursuits? I say I know. I know it better than anyone else but at some point of time you just want to prove that you can do it too, you want to have the things that they have if not all but some and you realized you have tried so hard. You have given it all your best but life doesn't want to cut you some slack. Today I was really thinking of my houseman posting and the choices that I made to the various hospitals and I realized all the choices is not what I want. And having to experience the green grass of Putrajaya, I can't help but to be tempted to want to work there and maybe I even have said a prayer to God to send me there. I want to live in a house where I don't have to bark and beg people constantly to make up the bed, pick up the wet towels and wash the bathroom. And the house will be forever clean because I'll be the only one living there. No, I don't like to live alone but somehow just the thought of that future prospect in a distant fantasy is so peaceful.

I've always wanted it so badly, a house on my own, a clean house of my own because I'm just so so tired of putting up with everyone and the mess they make! But I know that whatever that I have painstakingly typed in the above paragraph will be another want that I can never get. Just like the first two ones it will stay in fantasy.

It's like I should almost stop wanting for things in life because if there's anyone who knows it better than anyone else then it's definitely me, knowing the fact that I never get what I want in life. I just settle for what was given to me and learn to live with it with my might best. But deep down...

The Chronicles of Haknessess

2008-08-05T22:54:00.007+08:00

Hak means "malang". This term will be repeatedly used in this entry.

Maybe this little trip to Negeri Sembilan was not meant to be and we simply went against the forces of the universe or rather the forces of hakness. Since then we were jinxed.

Our little trip was confirmed to consist of Min Ying (MY), Chin Yee (CY), Ee Lin (EL), Seng Yeong (SY), and me. To ease readers to follow through the chronicles of the hakness, our events will be narrated according to days and hak situation will be numbered orderly.

Day 1

We were suppose to alight from KL Sentral KTM Terminal at 1 pm.

Hak Event 1: MY only woke up at 12.30 pm. By the time we got into the train it was 3.30pm though the train was scheduled to come earlier than the specified time but then again KTM trains never come early!!!! So, go figure.

Hak Event 2: We couldn’t reach CY on her Maxis mobile number, all of us took repeated turns to call her but suddenly only Mag could get to CY on her Digi network. It was later decided on Day 3 on our way back that it was indeed Mag who was the Hak controlling queen as our trip was only meant to be five people and she silently showed up in KL Sentral without any of us knowing just like how HAK surprises us. And since only Mag had the brilliance to call CY on her other number, we came to that conclusion, although MY was more like the hak ‘angel’ because she started off the chain of hakness, SY later pointed that this hak event 2 was the most important event because it was indeed giving us a sign not to continue with our trip. It’s like a silent whisper saying…” Go back to where you came from…..’’

But of course we didn’t see that as a warning sign and we continued with our trip. We were introduced to this Wii game from

Taiwan

, of course courtesy of Tat, CY’s other half in CY’s place. See, Wii is a kind of video game akin to play station but you actually get to play tennis, bowling, boxing and other games just like how you play it in real life just without the racquet's and gadgets but you use a remote control instead. Well, I got to say we really had good time with that especially when I discovered I had this inborn unidentified talent for boxing :D

Our day 1 dinner was awesome and I have to say the BBQ crab we had was definitely one of the best I have tasted.

That night we stargazed in CY’s front yard. We all agreed that CY’s house is undoubtedly the coolest and one of a kind. With newspapers as our mat, we laid on the wet dew filled grass looking at stars where CY was giving MY and SY lessons on how to spot Aquarious in the sky and telling some Chinese legend stories.

Hak event 3: We saw 4 shooting stars. Not one, not two….but FOUR!!!! And four isn’t a good number. See we only figure this out on day 2 of trip after experiencing more hak moments. Only then did it make sense!!!!!

Day 2

Hak Event 4: The day began with hakness again. The Hakka mee shop that we were suppose to go for breakfast was closed and even CY was unaware of it. Nevertheless the substitution breakfast we had was spectacular. After a truly heart meal, we were all geared up to continue our journey to Padas Hot Spring totally unaware of the hakness that awaits us at the end of the journey.

Hak Event 5: Tuesday: Closed. The signage killed us instantly. We couldn't believe our luck. We traveled all the way under the scorching hot sun just to find it closed. Hmm, seems like the Negeri folks do take time off on Tuesdays. So we had no choice but to turn back home =(

We were just on time to catch the breathtaking sunset and we took countless numbers of shot and it just hit me that we didn’t get one perfect jumping beach group shot ,well this is probably due the hak curse and we also made our own Bagan Lalang walk of fame which no one can really see because it was hak dark! Our next destination was Bagan Lalang beach.

The beach was dirty courtesy to the third class minded citizen who visited it but nevertheless mother nature made up to it and showed us one of her finest moments because the sunset was absolutely mind blowing and the moments dipping in the sea watching the sun go down. Well what I can say: The best things in life are free. Next destination was the supposedly good ikan bakar stalls near the beach.

Hak Event 6: We got out of the car and walked towards the restaurant and suddenly the light went off and for a good 3 minutes we just stood there in darkness and dumbfounded by the swirl of hakness that never seem to be ending. Well luckily this curse worn off as soon as it came and we manage to settle ourselves on the dinner table and was halfway through our meal when the next hak event caught us off guard.

Hak Event 7: Suddenly everyone of us was screaming at the top of our lungs even though maybe only one of us knew why. Then we saw the culprit. A lizard. It dropped on Ee Lin's head and with all our scream that scared the living life out of it, it manage to fall on the table, and took some de tour on 2 of our meal and leaped somewhere else with its' heart in its feet. Poor fellow!!!! He was probably the hakkest of us all! Maybe it was because we ordered the bamboo clams and later when they recooked or reshuffled our dish for another new one, I lost my appetite to eat it again as every single clam now looks like a lizard to me. So as you see here, Ee Lin had tailed her share of hakness. We finished our dinner and left and the next hak event followed through.

Hak Event 8: CY left the Wii game at her grandma's place and somewhere along the highway she remembered and we had to turn back and make a repeat trip. Our repeat trip was quite fun as we had MY as the 'slow but gradually picked up the spinning style' DJ and we were all the band members of the band called 'Untitled' (since we didn't name our band at all). The group howling was quite a moment I would say =) Endorphine releasing activity!

Day 3

We woke up rather late and manage to have that bowl of Hakka Mee that passed us by the day before. It was really good and we didn't really have any plans for the day so we decided to head to Jusco Seremban 2 for a little city shopping mall tour. We wanted to sing karaoke but the beeline was way too long and none of the movie that was showing interest us, so we headed to the gaming arcade and decided to play pool where the next hak event occurred.

Hak Event 9: So we were about to start our pool game and I noticed that one pool ball was missing. The important white one and so I obligatorily inserted my hand into that drain like hole where you pick pool balls from only to have it stuck there for an eternity. Nah, I was just exaggerating but I attracted enough attention to be the next 60 secs star. Suddenly, my hak

black bangle choose to nest itself in that hole and refuse to come out. So there I was with one hand stuck in that hak hole looking like a complete idiot and everyone around me was giving me words of encouragement ( I knew they meant well) but all I felt was intense irritation because my hand was starting to hurt and the skin was already peeling off from too much pulling. Finally the game arcade manager or whoever it was with the key came and set me free and I lost my fame. I could feel relief flooding through my entire system the moment he set me free. Just when I thought, I could be free of the curse, I was damned too. After that hak event, we decided we had enough and just wanted to go home. CY insisted that our final pit stop should be to staple the famous "Seremban Sie Pau" and the egg tart.

Hak Event 10: This time hakness came in the form of a confectionery. They ran out off egg tart in the first shop and we had to drive to another shop to pick up our tarts. Sigh.

That ended our hak trip but on the whole it was fun. Really good fun minus all the hakness!!! On behalf of everyone us, I would personally like to thank CY for the being a very good host and gave us a really hospitable environment and to Mag for being our official photographer. The photos here are all complimentary from Mag.

Bahasa Malaysia, Bahasa Kebangsaan

2008-07-11T21:53:00.006+08:00

3 minggu yang lalu, saya ditag oleh Jojo untuk menulis lembaran ini. Kini, saya ingin menyahut cabaran rakan seperjuangan saya untuk memblog dalam bahasa kebangsaan kita.

7 fakta tentang saya

1. Saya tak gemar minum horlicks! Saya rasa saya tak pernah minumnya.

2. Saya suka hujan, matahari pagi, embun malam dan segala-galanya pasal alam sekitar.

3. Saya sangat fasih bercakap bahasa Melayu dan lagi hebat daripada Jojo.

4. Sehingga kini ayah saya masih menyuruh saya menyediakan ucapannya dalam bahasa Melayu walaupun adik saya masih menuntut dalam tingkatan 5. (Satu lagi fakta menunjukkan kehebatan saya dalam bahasa Melayu sunggupun telah 7 tahun saya meninggalkan dunia persekolahan)

5. Tiba-tiba saya rasa sangat tua selepas menaip ayat di atas.

6. Kadang-kadang saya rasa diri saya ganjil! ( Terjemahan langusng perkataan Weird)

7. Tidak seperti Jojo saya tidak memerlukan bantuan kamus!

7 perkara yang menakutkan saya

1. Saya takut kehilangan orang-orang yang saya sayangi dan yang menyayangi saya.

2. Lipas.

3.Lipas yang berterbangan.

4.Kadang-kadang ketinggian, tetapi saya tidak begitu kisah terhadapnya kerana saya yang melap kipas, dinding dan segala benda yang tinggi di rumah saya. Saya juga menaiki Solero shots di Genting. Ternyata menghadapi ketakutan anda menjadikan anda manusia berani!!!! KKK = ketawa kuat kuat.

5. Saya takut kesunyian! Perasaan seperti tiada orang yang kisah tentang saya.

6. Perasaan helplessness macam tak boleh buat apa-apa dan hanya mampu melihat!

7.Sunggupun saya tidak mahu menulis ini, tetapi Jojo telah mempengaruhi saya, jadi saya pun takut mati seorang dara.~muka tersengih macam kerang busuk~

7 lagu kegemaran saya

1. Saya milikmu ( I'm Yours) - Jason Mraz

2. Rumah (Home) - Micheal Buble

3. Apa yang harus aku lakukan (What can I do)- The Corrs

4. Ia belum berakhir ( It's not over )- Daughtry

5. Keriangan ( Bubbly)- Colbie Cailat

6. Jatuh terjaga (Falling awake) - Gary Jules

7. Hampir tidak bernafas( Barely breathing)- Duncan Sheikh

7 pekara yang saya selalu sebut

1. I'll give you one tight slap :P

2. Babi!

3. Really?

4. 4 perkataan lagi, saya tidak tahu kerana tatabahasa saya hebat dan saya tidak mengulangi perkataan. hehe....

7 pekara yang sangat bernilai

1. Hubungan saya dengan dengan Tuhan.

2. Keluarga saya.

3. Kawan-kawan rapat saya.

4. Alam sekitar.

5. Diri saya.

6. Kemampuan untuk membuat seseorang senyum =)

7.Kebolehan kita untuk mencintai seseorang sedalam-dalamya!

7 pertama kali dalam hidup saya

1. Melihat planet Musytari dan Zuhal dengan menggunakan teleskop ( Bagi mereka yang tidak arif dengan planet-planet, ia juga dikenali sebagai Saturn & Jupiter dalam bahasa Inggeris)

2. Membaling batu untuk melepaskan segala-gala yang terpendam di dalam hati di Empangan Sg.Selangor. ( Ini memang best) sambil menjerit kuat-kuat.

3. Menari di atas bar yang terbakar tanpa rentung!!!! KKK!!!

4. Melihat buruj(constellaations) di langit dan mampu mengenal apa bentuknya. Scorpio yang paling cantik!

5. Muntah selepas mabuk :p

6. Menjerit di dalam KTM sekuat hati..."Boleh tak bagi orang keluar dulu'' selepas dihempap oleh manusia busuk yang tidak mempunyai kesedaran sivik. Saya terpaksa untuk menyelamatkan diri saya.

7. Serta melakukan beberapa benda pelik yang tidak harus saya beritahu di sini :P

Phuket Day 3

2008-07-06T00:14:00.008+08:00

The third day trip has a story on its own.

It began with the cancellation of our trip to James Bond Island because we thought it would rain and hence we thought we could talk to our tour guide to see if she can offer us something better in return. It was either the Aqua Show( where unreal girls do real performance) or the Thai girl a.k.aTiger show ( where real girls do the unbelievable but real stunts where you only must see once because you'll be to disgusted to even watch it the second time).

This is of course how our tour guide put it, so of course we chose the second opinion because it was uniquely Thai. But luck wasn't on our side, because the Thai girl show( which became Tiger show because of the mispronunciations from people) place was charred in a fire the night before. So we had to settle for the second best which was the Aqua show. We had the morning for ourselves, so we walked around Patong Beach and played in the sea and had tattoo by the beach and some of us braided our hair too.

The Aqua show is a class on it's own. I would personally recommend first time Phuket visitors to take a watch. The show was entirely put up by 'woman' . By that I mean men by nature and it was a spectacular entertaining show. At the end of the show,we thought it was not all a bad swap after all but it would get boring to watch it again and again assuming they put up the same show everyday.

I guess next time around, we could try our luck with the Thai girl show and the James Bond island of course.

Verdict of day 3: You should take time to explore the Patong Beach if you have the time and walk the entire length of the beach and of course the Aqua show is a no miss.

Some pictures from Day 3 of trip

Someone really knows how to have fun =)

Tatooed but fake ;p

Don't mess with me

The Aqua show

The complete cast

I know, right!!

See, don't touch!

Phuket's night life

Beers in the room before we headed home the next morning

Phuket Day 2

2008-06-28T13:51:00.008+08:00

To be honest, I forgot the details of the trip already hmm maybe because the trip was a month ago and because I'm just so lazy to blog about it but since I have the habit of not living things hanging in the air I shall for the benefit of everyone still blog about it.

Our day 2 trip was suppose to be to the Phi Phi Island and the Maya Bay. However due to the horribly unpredictable weather we spoiled two third of the trip that day. Still we enjoyed the 'cruise' ride. We sat on the deck with both legs hanging over the boat and the cold sea breeze slapping our cheek, the rain drops trailing down our faces. Oh, how we enjoyed it and we manage to pose for pictures too.

Phi Phi Island island was beautiful but the view and the sea could be clearer if it wasn't for the monsoon season. The snorkeling was as disappointing as the weather that day adding to the fact that I was naively unaware that my life jacket wasn't tight enough or rather I didn't really know how to wear it. Some life long lessons on life jacket that I learnt the hard way.

Lesson 1- Never wear a life jacket that is too big for you.

Lesson 2 - Insist on the best one that fits you even if there are hundreds of them queuing for it. Lesson 3- For God's sake tighten the strap especially the ones that goes around your leg and ends up somewhere near your privates.

So the point that I'm trying to put across is that I was floating half of the time in the sea because the freaking life jacket was too big and I saw no freaking fish and instead I was waiting to get back to the boat because I was exhausted trying to pull some stunts with the over sized life jacket. Then we couldn't stop at Maya Bay because it was raining. Later that day, we visited one of a Thai massage parlour that you find plenty in the streets of Phuket and had a good 2 hours traditional Thai massage.

Verdict of the day: Check out when is the best time to go a beach especially when you are spending a lot of money on it. But nevertheless the crazy cruise ride was an experience to die for! Why? Because of the weather of course!

Part of the waves that slapped our legs

On the deck under the downpour

Phuket Day 1

2008-05-27T17:31:00.005+08:00

A glimpse of the Phuket Island of Thailand in 4 days!

Our day trip in Phuket began with lunch at Soho's. Sounds posh. Not quite. It's actually a road side stall like place which serves very famous duck rice. It was priced at 350 Bhat about RM 3.50. It tasted ok maybe because I wasn't really a duck fan but then again anything is better than eating PORK ( Ee Lin will be so offended :D).

After that we started on our day trip to the Cashew Nut factory but to me it was more of like a makan factory. We got too see how real cashew nuts look and how they were processed. Trust me, if you see it along the road you won't say it is a cashew fruit. And then they have cashews of all varieties. Buttered, honeyed, satayed, garliced and chocolated and whatever that you can ed on. So you can taste all this as much as you like and you are not pressured to buy any. :D and then there are also other local food like the dodol, the shrimp and many dried fruits of various flavours which you can freely feast on. Finally they provide water for thirsty customers too.

We then headed on to the Beautiful Temples of Phuket ( No, this is not the name of the temple, I can't remember the name so we'll just have to settle with that). This area houses 4 huge temples with Buddha statues in it alongside many street dogs. One will be featured here. =) The interior of all the temples were intricately hand drawn and it really serves as a tourist attraction besides a place of worship. We had limited time to browse around leisurely every nook and corner of this temples because our tour guide, Tan kept rushing us for our next destination but we were glad to leave the temple area because the sun was scorching hot.

Our next pit stop was nothing like the previous one. We were chilled instantly by the mountain breeze. The Karon View Point where one can get the view point from Karon :D is a hill top with a little house where people can just chill and enjoy the absolutely breathtaking view of the Phuket island. We were hoping to catch the sun go down but it was way too early for a sunset and besides the rest had the Fantasea show to catch. Since I opted not to go for the show, I shall not feature it here though I have the pictures from the rest of them who went but I'm just to lazy to resize it. The review was that it was really good. So if you have the extra cash in hand you should watch it.

The rest of the gang headed to Fantasea Show after dinner while I stayed back with Pei Ying because I was short of cash and we just walked around the area near our hotel, The Royal Paradise Hotel which wasn't' really royal but the strategic location made up to the whatever it lacked.

Verdict of the Day : The City Tour can be quite boring. I mean it's not something you want to do every time, and since I'm an adrenaline junkie, I didn't find it that appealing like I said just a one time thingy. But Karon View Point is a beauty on its own.

Coming soon-Phuket Day 2...

Tagged

2008-04-28T01:10:00.005+08:00

I was recently tagged by Josephine so here's doing the tag thing.. The Rules

1. Link to your tagger and post these rules.

2. List eight (8) random facts about yourself.

3. Tag eight people at the end of this post and list their names.

4. Let them know they’ve been tagged by leaving them a comment on their blogs.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

8 random facts about myself

1. I think I have a PhD in housekeeping :D

2. I love being in touch with nature. I believe everyone should take time to know the nature. To love it.

3. I secretly adore my dad way too much so much so that I think if I met him some 27 years ago, I'd ask him to marry me. =)

4. I want to bungee jump and sky dive before I die. And just like Jo, I'm afraid of heights too!

5. People who litter about and put mp3 songs on loudspeaker on public transport annoy the living daylight out of me.

6. I think my friends are one of God's best gift to me.

7. If I repeatedly say a word too many times, I forget what it means. I know it's weird but I can't help it either.

8. I secretly believe I have the sixth sense :D

The rule is to 8 Tag People. I'm not interested!